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Trivial things that make you surly


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Wow, not only are you a cannibal, but a glutton too.

Got a summons today to appear in Houston City Court as a witness.  The fuckstick that rear ended me on I10 and totaled my car is contesting his ticket.  I’m going to ask for the death penalty.

Well, it's like this....  

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19 hours ago, UpperWestside said:

The one that used to get to me that was absolutely trivial is when you are standing in line for a good long while and you’re prepared to pay as soon as you get to the cashier. However, the person in front of you was not prepared and then had to find their wallet or purse and in some cases pull out exact change if they were paying in cash.

I watched this play out in front of me the other day. The woman put her money on the conveyor belt and was older so she was not moving fast and you could tell English was her 2nd language (grocery store near where I live in East Harlem). The woman behind me was not having this delay and she made her thoughts known pretty quickly. She kept on until the woman finished. 

Username does not check out  

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20 hours ago, ztejas said:

I don't know what the fuck has happened to Sonic but holy shit their service has gotten to the point where I almost can't even go there anymore. They are starting to rival Popeyes for absolute incompetence (which I haven't been to in forever for that reason). This is across a few locations in Austin, my last 5 experiences:

1. Pull up. Hit the button. Wait 5 minutes. Hit the button again. Keep waiting. Fuck it. Leave.

2. Go to a different Sonic (I was picking it up for someone else and this was easier than audibling). Experience here was fine - but this was batting .500 for the day.

3. Pull up. Out of ice cream (yes - at fucking Sonic). 

4. Pull up. Order. Get my drinks. One of which was an iced tea with lime and a flavor add in. It was probably the worst drink I've ever had from Sonic and I've had the exact same thing before. Like whoever made it was too high to function.

5. Pull up. Hit the button. Wait. "We'll be with you in a minute". Wait some more. Order a corn dog and iced tea with lime. Wait 20 minutes (for a fucking drink and a corn dog). Get my order - no lime in my iced tea.

I don't know if this is just in Austin or what but God it's getting irritating. I don't even get fast food that much - but sometimes I want a big drink or a milkshake or something and Sonic used to be convenient and on point with these items - no longer apparently.

Stupid Okies. Can't even manage a fast food chain properly.

Use the app.  Sonic is ready with your food when you check in.  Chick fil a and Whataburger wait until you check in to make your order.  WTF is the point of ordering ahead if I have to wait fifteen minutes after I check in at the restaurant.  Oh and the chick fil a by me has gotten very fucking slow, I'm going to start going to the other one near me.

Edited by Ray Cranham
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On 3/23/2021 at 4:50 PM, Onboard 2.0 said:

Keeps my nipples hard.... wait... wrong forum....

Which forum would such a topic be found in?

Asking for a friend with soft, supple nipples in need of stiffening. 

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7 hours ago, Trey3216 said:

Username does not check out  

I have had to explain the username a few times. Short version is I liked hanging out over there because I used to go to the AMC by Lincoln Center and I love the Natural History Museum. I would not live over there though. I prefer an area with a vibrant culture (Puerto Ricans are pretty awesome people!) like the one in my neighborhood.

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1 hour ago, Bender Bending Rodriguez said:

A very stiff Red Bull and vodka will get you back into game shape in a hurry. 

Do not ignore the OG Bloody Mary. It's got electrolytes.

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On 3/24/2021 at 11:11 PM, Sam Lin said:

I've gone through maybe 3 micro USB cables in the same time that I've gone through 12 or so Lightning cables. I'll take micro USB any day.

Two of the three Amazon Basics micro USBs that I bought have taken a shit since 1/31.

USB-C blows the fuck out of B.

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Fatties in catalogs. I got the old lady's Victoria's Secret swimwear book. Ready to check the scenery, my eyes were accosted by page after page of fatties. I did not even know VS sold shit in size 18. Keep that shit at Lane Bryant or provide a #triggerwarning.

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5 minutes ago, elfenix said:

when you're typing your username (or whatever) into a website, and then the site finishes loading and clears out what you just typed

I can think of a simple way to avoid that happening and it won’t cost you any time. 

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1 hour ago, Kyle said:

Fatties in catalogs. I got the old lady's Victoria's Secret swimwear book. Ready to check the scenery, my eyes were accosted by page after page of fatties. I did not even know VS sold shit in size 18. Keep that shit at Lane Bryant or provide a #triggerwarning.

Boy, wait until you see the SI Swimsuit issue..

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3 hours ago, Kyle said:

Fatties in catalogs. I got the old lady's Victoria's Secret swimwear book. Ready to check the scenery, my eyes were accosted by page after page of fatties. I did not even know VS sold shit in size 18. Keep that shit at Lane Bryant or provide a #triggerwarning.

So are ya' getting a one piece or two piece for the upcoming summer?

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6 hours ago, Kyle said:

Fatties in catalogs. I got the old lady's Victoria's Secret swimwear book. Ready to check the scenery, my eyes were accosted by page after page of fatties. I did not even know VS sold shit in size 18. Keep that shit at Lane Bryant or provide a #triggerwarning.

It was all downhill once Teri Garr stopped modeling her undies for the Sears Catalog ...

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Stepped out to run an errand tonight and some f'n cocksucker had bashed in the driver side front quarter panel of my car. Probably not drivable, not gonna fuck with it. So after 10 years with  no claims on my auto policy, I filed 2 separate claims in 2 days - one for hail damage from the Thursday storm and one for hit and run. I guess that's why you have auto insurance, but I'm sure I'll see  nice bump in premiums. Fucking fuck.

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hagglers and low-ballers on classifieds.  for gadgets and electronics like phone and camera equipment and stuff, i end up giving to friends cuz i really cant put up with certain people online.

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The matches they give you at the cigar store don’t burn long enough to light a cigar with a single match. I just use a lighter. But if you’re giving out matches then give out half as many that are twice the size. 

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I hate wasting a clean utensil out of the drawer just for one quick stir of my coffee. Sometimes I'll take a spoon that was used for stirring something else and I'll flip it around and use the clean end and stir with the handle. If there's nothing available I just try to swirl the cup and then tend to get scalding hot coffee on me. I know, it's kinda weird.

Edited by DougO
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2 minutes ago, DougO said:

I hate wasting a clean utensil out of the drawer just for one quick stir of my coffee. Sometimes I'll take a spoon that was used for stirring something else and I'll flip it around and use the clean end and stir with the handle. If there's nothing available I just try to swirl the cup and then tend to get scalding hot coffee on me. I know, it's kinda weird.

Put whatever it is in your coffee first and then pour the coffee into the cup in a fashion that creates a whirlpool effect.  Problem solved.  No utensils  

 

 

Or drink your coffee like a damn man and don't put shit in it.  

Edited by Trey3216
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3 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

Put whatever it is in your coffee first and then pour the coffee into the cup in a fashion that creates a whirlpool effect.  Problem solved.  No utensils  

I do that with the sweetener, but I don't like to do that with the milk because it makes it weird.

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6 minutes ago, DougO said:

I hate wasting a clean utensil out of the drawer just for one quick stir of my coffee. Sometimes I'll take a spoon that was used for stirring something else and I'll flip it around and use the clean end and stir with the handle. If there's nothing available I just try to swirl the cup and then tend to get scalding hot coffee on me. I know, it's kinda weird.

Swizzlefinger is your best bet.

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2 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

The matches they give you at the cigar store don’t burn long enough to light a cigar with a single match. I just use a lighter. But if you’re giving out matches then give out half as many that are twice the size. 

Strike 2-3 matches at a time. 

But you'll get a more even burn by using a torch anyway. 

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On 2/27/2021 at 9:10 PM, markstanco said:

"You know what they say about our state (insert state), wait 15 minutes and the weather will change."

Yea, Texas and California and New York and Wisconsin and Florida sometimes drop 20 degrees in 2 hours and all the sudden it snows. Or it is sunny and starts raining.

Thats called weather on the planet called earth. It has nothing to do with political boundaries. Fok those 28 iq people who think they have extreme weather in their state.

You know what they say about the weather in Seattle...If you don't like it, just wait 15 minutes. 

And then shoot yourself in the face. 

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fuck you, manufacturers of the gigantic TP rolls that are so big that they have to be wedged into the roller space and get stuck and won’t roll, so you can only get one tiny piece off at a time. 
 

fuck you, whoever actually puts them on the roller that way, for fucks sake put it on the counter or the back of the toilet or whatever until it gets to a size smaller than a bike tire.  
 

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On 3/29/2021 at 10:47 AM, deadshank said:

About 10 miles of this chicanery.   Truckers don’t care. Nary a vehicle within half a mile in front of the trucker in the number 1 lane.  

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I, uh, know someone, who sometimes will slip in front of that passing truck once he finally moves over, and then brake down to well below the speed limit.  Long enough to send a message and make sure he lost all the time he tried to save by screwing over the 2 dozen faster vehicles that piled up behind his selfish plodding turtle pass.

Edited by clapclapclap
Added benefit of penalizing the truck he was passing, who refused to briefly ease up a couple of mphs so that the other truck could get past and let the big line of cars piling up get through sooner.
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10 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

I, uh, know someone, who sometimes will slip in front of that passing truck once he finally moves over, and then brake down to well below the speed limit.  Long enough to send a message and make sure he lost all the time he tried to save by screwing over the 2 dozen faster vehicles that piled up behind his selfish plodding turtle pass.

Pure fuck around and find out, right there.

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