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elfenix

Trivial things that make you surly

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Is never using your blinker trivial? It shouldn’t be because it’s right there on the steering column and hey as a fellow motorist sharing the road I’d like to know your intentions sometimes so I can safely navigate around you. And if you don’t use I’d like to rip it out and stab you in the neck with it 

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13 minutes ago, CfRhTxStBobcats said:

A chick that pulls it out of her mouth at the last second and finishes it off with her hand. I guess that's not trivial, but it sure as hell is annoying.

A note to you youngsters.  Don't ever marry this type of selfish bitch.  If she won't swallow your load, she also won't wipe your ass or clean up your puke when you get food poisoning, which you will if you visit St. Louis.  She'll also probably expect you to change poopie diapers.  The woman that swallows, isn't shallow.

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What is the etiquette regarding assholes playing music on their golf cart boom box on the course? Do I use a 7 iron to smash their skulls before or after I smash their radio?

It was Tejano music if that makes a difference.

And yes it was from the radio, so I got to hear the Spanish DJ gibberish in between songs as well.

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48 minutes ago, Hunchback said:

Wife eats grapes before buying while shopping at the grocery store. 

I believe that's called stealing.

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14 hours ago, LoneStarBiker said:

Haha, yeah unfortunately there are a lot of newbs and assholes that don't understand the concept of "share the road".  Saw a group of dipshits on FM1626 in the construction zone this weekend where there is absolutely no shoulder going <20 mph with a train of cars behind them.  There is a digital sign prior to the construction basically saying, "hey cyclists, there is no shoulder ahead" and they still went that route.  Even as a fellow cyclist, I had no qualms as I rolled down my window and called them out for that assholery. 

that driver was a fucking hero and he got crucified by the media.  such a travesty.  

Edited by futureman

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People who don't use their blinkers.

People that press the call button when elevator doors are closing or stick their hand in closing elevator doors.

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8 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

What is the etiquette regarding assholes playing music on their golf cart boom box on the course? Do I use a 7 iron to smash their skulls before or after I smash their radio?

It was Tejano music if that makes a difference.

And yes it was from the radio, so I got to hear the Spanish DJ gibberish in between songs as well.

This is becoming a huge problem around here. I don't think you are required to use a specific club, whatever feels right will work. Just don't bend the shaft.

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4 hours ago, Dry Elbows said:

People who don't use their blinkers.

People that press the call button when elevator doors are closing or stick their hand in closing elevator doors.

I'll agree strongly with the first.

That said the assholes that bum rush in the opening door is way worse than the door stopper. 8 am, at a hotel with 3 stories and 1, ONE elevator I'm headed down with my luggage and 4 people. 2 chicks and their dumb ass boy friends all bum rush in. They looked shocked when I basically plow through them. One of the boy friends mouths off, I guess he's in a hurry.

"No dumbass, figure out how fucking elevators work!".

"Don't be an asshole."

"I post on Surly, I absolutely have to be an asshole."

Edited by BurntEyes

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Why are elevators so hard for people to get?  It's simple and a principle applied to many other situations.  Unload, then load.  If you have a full mug of coffee do you pour more into it or drink that shit first?

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2 minutes ago, Llogg said:

Why are elevators so hard for people to get?  It's simple and a principle applied to many other situations.  Unload, then load.  If you have a full mug of coffee do you pour more into it or drink that shit first?

You take a wiff, then take a 10 minute shit on the clock while you wait for it to cool a bit.

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My postman always talks on the phone, loudly, while walking through the neighborhood delivering mail.  This pisses my dog off when he gets to my house and she pretty much explodes barking.

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3 hours ago, RTF Horn said:

My postman always talks on the phone, loudly, while walking through the neighborhood delivering mail.  This pisses my dog off when he gets to my house and she pretty much explodes barking.

If only there was some method to correct a dog's behavior. 

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1 minute ago, WhatTheBuck said:

If only there was some method to correct a dog's behavior. 

She's fine most of the time, pretty chill.  Sudden noises like a dude talking loudly right by the front door...she doesn't like that too much.

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Idoits that come to a complete stop, put on emergency flashers and creep by doing 3 MPH at the site of a minor fender bender that is pulled off to the side of inbound Katy Freeway this morning.  After said idoit clears the scene they continue on at 3 MPH with flashers still on and keep looking at in their rearview mirror at minor fender bender.  

Of course, I honk at them and they flip me off and then come to a complete stop again on the exit ramp at Silber.

Yes, it was a woman in a Porsche Cayenne.

 

Just shorten to 'Katy Freeway' as a catch-all for all of the rage inducing bullshit that occurs on that road.

 

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that driver was a fucking hero and he got crucified by the media.  such a travesty.  
Cyclists don't share the road whatsoever. They just like to say that.

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People telling you to "Have a nice day" when you know damn well they could careless if you do or not....
Very trivial, so perfect.

That's them just being polite.

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22 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

I believe that's called stealing.

She said she has to make sure the grapes taste good before she buys them. I asked her if it was ok to open up a new box of cereal she'd never tasted to try before she bought it but she didn't like that question. 

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2 hours ago, Hunchback said:

She said she has to make sure the grapes taste good before she buys them. I asked her if it was ok to open up a new box of cereal she'd never tasted to try before she bought it but she didn't like that question. 

There's a difference between fresh fruit and processed grains. 

Report her to security next time. See what happens. They don't care if you sample olives from the olive bar, either. Ever ask for samples at the deli counter? They'll give them to you. 

Edited by WhatTheBuck

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21 hours ago, Hoosier Longhorn said:

People telling you to "Have a nice day" when you know damn well they could careless if you do or not....

That’s probably a little more polite than saying, “get out.” 

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When people just throw their cigarette butts on the ground.  I want to pick them up, follow them home and toss them into their living room.  

Littering in general makes me want to eat their liver with some fava beans and a nice key-YAN-tee.

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7 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

There's a difference between fresh fruit and processed grains. 

Report her to security next time. See what happens. They don't care if you sample olives from the olive bar, either. Ever ask for samples at the deli counter? They'll give them to you. 

I’ll be eating from a freshly opened bag of popcorn that I will sample and decide if I like it while this occurs. What could go wrong?

Edited by I Plead Da Fif

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2 hours ago, nycHorn said:

When people just throw their cigarette butts on the ground.  I want to pick them up, follow them home and toss them into their living room.  

Littering in general makes me want to eat their liver with some fava beans and a nice key-YAN-tee.

This.  I don't throw trash out of my car, why is it acceptable for smokers to litter?

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When people just throw their cigarette butts on the ground.  I want to pick them up, follow them home and toss them into their living room.  
Littering in general makes me want to eat their liver with some fava beans and a nice key-YAN-tee.
That and people who throw their flossing picks on the ground. Fucking disgusting.

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A person that is first in line at a red light and when it turns green it takes them 2 fucking miles to get up to the speed limit.

Almost always a woman.

 

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On 3/29/2018 at 8:17 AM, Shoxthemonkey said:

This is becoming a huge problem around here. I don't think you are required to use a specific club, whatever feels right will work. Just don't bend the shaft.

I'm pretty sure this is the real purpose that the hybrid #5 club was invented for.  You have the control of an iron but the ass whipping mass/size of a wood as it comes down on said boom box.

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Going to Lowes to get an 85 watt LED flood light since you need to replace one, and fuckers don't have the one you want. You then proceed to look on amazon and they don't have them either.  So now I will have to drive to Home Depot later to see if they have them.

I am not going to have non matching bulbs in the house.  I will have to change them all and thats a shit ton of light bulbs.

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How hard is it to pull to the front gas pump? Two or three pumps open ahead of you. Maybe I'm too considerate for 2018. Being ex-military, I am very situationally-aware. I guess people do it without thinking.

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