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Posted
3 hours ago, msucolt45 said:

The aggy “Pat” sports writer is hilarious believing what he/she’s been spoon fed.

The Texas Longhorns are a National/Worldwide brand.  aggy is a Slovacek sausage and Buc-ee’s sponsored Texas brand.

Hook’em!!!

I don't think aggy Pat™ believes what (s)he serves the ag faithful. I find it quite likely that the gag is just too much fun, and now profitable from the clicks, to abandon.

  • Hook 'Em 2
  • Like 1
Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, Magus Ossis said:

I don't think aggy Pat™ believes what (s)he serves the ag faithful. I find it quite likely that the gag is just too much fun, and now profitable from the clicks, to abandon.

I'm confident aggie Pat saw the formulaic, predictable drivel produced by Billy. They then caught wind of the millions he was grifting from the aggie athletic department and the marks on Texags. They proceeded to use this formula and ChatGBT to produce a glowing, gushing and similarly formulaic email to the powers that be at Gig'em Gazzette. The fine editorial staff at Gig'em Gazzette was blow away by the love, deep appreciation and understanding aggie Pat had not only for the "history" of aggie sports but the "noble military traditions" we all know and love. 

Thus was my boy Graham was born, and he'll ride this wave until a chink appears in the armor and he can take down Billy as the aggie soothsayer. 

It is written, so let it be done. 

Edited by BurntEyes
Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, Genco said:
  Hide contents

As an Aggie, I'm used to feeling inferior to our in-state rival, the University of Texas.

Our last football title happened during the Clinton administration. Our claim to fame is the fake military that parades around campus. While UT students get a taste of big city living in Austin, Aggies are left with, well, whatever it is you do for fun in College Station (I never quite figured it out). 

I've made peace with it. I loved my time at Texas A&M. I made good friends, got a degree, and am gainfully employed. I come from a long line of Aggies, and though I was taught to loathe the color orange, I even befriended a few T-Sips, some of whom are valued friends and colleagues. 

But I'm more than a little miffed about an under-the-radar aspect of the A&M - UT rivalry: the celebs, alum and not, who hang around the Forty Acres. I asked my newsroom colleagues to name some famous Longhorns, and I must admit that the sheer number of A-listers that have passed through Austin is impressive.

Wes Anderson. Matthew McConaughey. Owen Wilson. Walter Cronkite. Jayne Mansfield. Glen Powell. Jon Hamm (don't look up why Hamm never graduated). Trevante Rhodes. Kevin Durant. Richard Linklater. Xavier Worthy. Farah Fawcett. Janis Joplin. Roger Clemens. Neil deGrasse Tyson. Renee Zellweger. Kinky Friedman. One of the guys from the Velvet Underground. Governors. Congressmen. A First Lady. Christ almighty, maybe what starts in Austin really does change the world.

By comparison, the roster of former A&M students is thin. Former Disney star Tiffany Thornton? Fightin' Texas Aggie. Oscar nominee and character actor Rip Torn? Class of '52, baby. George P. Mitchell probably wouldn't have been able to develop the Woodlands without a degree from the Texas A&M University. Rick Perry. Martín Torrijos, the 35th president of Panama. My grandmother saw distinguished alum Lyle Lovett play a show at a small bar near campus once. The guy who designed the Burj Khalifa. I mean no offense to Rip Torn, who was hilarious in Freddy Got Fingered, but this is embarrassing, guys. 

I get it, on some level. Texas A&M can't hold a candle to UT's radio and film program. If you want to get into showbusiness or journalism, UT is the place to go. But plenty of business leaders, inventors and politicians have gone through Aggieland. We've had some sports icons, too. Mike Evans is cool. Von Miller is an alum, even if he's not that into us. Dude Perfect was fun when I was in middle school. Johnny Manziel was cool before, well, everything. Robert Earl Keen has some great records. I can live with this.

What really grinds my gears, however, is the differences in celebrities who have attached themselves to Texas' flagship schools. 

Nowhere was the disparity bigger than last fall. After the Longhorns demolished Oklahoma in the Red River Rivalry game in October, pop superstar Dua Lipa donned a custom Texas jersey during her set at Austin City Limits Music Festival. Who showed up to rep my school that season? None other than perennial Arizona also-ran Kari Lake, who hung out on the sidelines of the Aug. 31 season opener in a maroon "HOWDY" shirt as a guest of Ted Cruz. Texas A&M lost that game 13-23 to Duke, and Lake would lose her race for U.S. Senate to Democrat Ruben Gallego months later. Lake went to Iowa. Why is she at my alma mater? George H.W. Bush's name is all over College Station, and he went to Yale. And when Drake has attached himself to your brand in this day and age, something has gone terribly wrong. 

If Kendrick Lamar was right that Drake runs to Atlanta when he needs street cred, then celebs, Texan or not, run to College Station when they need to borrow some Real Texas Authenticity™. When conservative influencers do live shows, they head to College Station. While Matthew McConaughey teaches classes at UT, we got a Richard Spencer rally. After his acquittal in 2022, Kyle Rittenhouse declared his intention to attend Texas A&M University (he was never accepted). 

A&M's conservative reputation is well-earned. This is a school that, for much of its history, was an all-male military school. Tradition, honor, integrity—these are Aggie values (although many would argue that so is racism and exclusion). It is, at first glance, the place for stuffy engineers and guys who want nothing more than an MBA. It is not the spot for artsy outcasts. 

But maybe UT just has better branding. The Longhorn logo is timeless and has been slapped on every piece of merchandise you can think of. Burnt orange is inescapable in Texas and often spotted all across the world. During a visit to the mall recently, I noticed that the store sold three trendy fashion baseball caps: Yankees, Dodgers and Longhorns. Just like C-listers and right-wing media types want a piece of Aggieland, there's a reason celebs want to rep burnt orange. It's a brand meant to signal prestige, good taste, nice upbringing. It says, "I am someone."

Maybe this is just my little brother complex talking; it is a little ridiculous to be annoyed by the people who attach themselves to your alma mater. I guess it's up to me to be the coolest person who went to Texas A&M. But then again, I paid all that tuition. Is it too much to ask that we get Pedro Pascal in something maroon and white? 

 

Rip Torn-After two years at A&M, he transferred to the University of Texas, in Austin, and earned a degree in drama.

From Texas Monthly article  https://www.texasmonthly.com/arts-entertainment/rip-on-a-tear/

 

Edited by bborange
  • Hook 'Em 3
  • Haha 6
Posted

There's only one dude shameless enough to write a column bragging about how well all of a team's former QBs are doing on other teams:

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image.png.2570b7829b642d2c7366ca7b08054f34.png

Quote

The Kentucky Wildcats announced this morning that former Texas A&M football quarterback Zach Calzada would be their starter behind center for the 2025 season. Calzada was thrust into action in the 2021 season after Haynes King went down on the first drive of game two against Colorado, starting the rest of the year for the Aggies— including the historic win over Alabama.

The rest of the way for the Aggies was a little bit up and down, however. The offense struggled mightily at times, even though the Mike Elko-coached defense played like one of the best in the nation, with the Ags winning a couple of rock fights along the way— see the 20-3 win over Auburn for a great example here.

Calzada ended up transferring out before the horrendous 2022 campaign, heading to Auburn and then Incarnate Word where he has been ever since. His numbers have been striking at the FCS level, and now he comes to Lexington hoping to recapture that magic for one of the SEC's most challenged programs.


Zach Calzada named Kentucky's starting QB as former Texas A&M signal callers continue to populate CFB landscape
Calzada is one of several former Aggie quarterbacks who are starting at their various programs around the country. A&M fans are focused on Marcel Reed, of course, but you can't deny that the A&M QB legacy is showing itself around the nation right now.

For one thing, you have Haynes King at Georgia Tech. The former Longview Lobo and twice-injured passer for the Aggies has made a name for himself in Atlanta, and will be one of the most experienced QBs in the ACC for this upcoming year. He's led the Rambling Wreck to a couple of big wins in his time, and he's hoping to continue that trend this fall.

Then, you have Conner Weigman down at Houston. After an up and mostly-down 2024, Weigman is looking to regain his five-star form in his home town under Willie Fritz's tutelage. I feel pretty confident in his ability to show out in that offense this year.

Jaylen Henderson is up at West Virginia with a shot to start, though it may be in a two-quarterback system. Though he only started a few games for the Aggies, he led them to a memorable win over the hapless Mississippi State Bulldogs in 2023 after Max Johnson went down with injury.


Yes, A&M quarterbacks are spread all over the map at this point. With this latest announcement about Calzada, though, there's one hope that Aggie fans have for the Kentucky Wildcats— one last way that he can come through for them. With Kentucky hosting the Longhorns, he'll have a shot to recreate his magic from 2021— and I know every Aggie fan will be watching and hoping for just such an outcome.

 

  • Haha 9
Posted

Counterpoint: just like you should never underestimate people’s capacity for stupidity, you should also never underestimate aggy’s capacity for using delusion and off-base irrelevant logic to make themselves feel good.

 

I say real. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Beau Vine said:

There's only one dude shameless enough to write a column bragging about how well all of a team's former QBs are doing on other teams:

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image.png.2570b7829b642d2c7366ca7b08054f34.png

 

QBRU

We recruit 'em, but you get to play 'em

Posted
27 minutes ago, South Austin said:

All of my doubts are removed.  Jesus Christ, I'm not sure I could've done a better troll job than his last piece.

Well, it was a 0/10 so I hope so. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Beau Vine said:

There's only one dude shameless enough to write a column bragging about how well all of a team's former QBs are doing on other teams:

0fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe40fc72b6b2085ba95628075928588d9314d95bbe4

image.png.2570b7829b642d2c7366ca7b08054f34.png

 

Graham's next column idea- bragging about how happy he is for his ex- girlfriend who dumped him (with his virginity intact) and then she went on to win AVN awards 

  • Haha 2
Posted

Fucking dammit.  I am becoming more annoyed every day that countless of these goobers are going to be on campus and I have to put up with them in a few weeks.  Going to be insufferable.  I am considering wearing my ND shirt, but wearing my UT hoodie just over it to piss them off.  

The worst part about it is I was given a free ticket by my cousin at my aunt's funeral.  He's one of the alum coordinators for the Chicago alum association.  Couldn't say no.  So I've got the double-edged sword of sitting in his package of group tickets (they're bringing two charter busses).  It will suck just to be around them (still love my cousin).  It will suck infinitely if we lose.  We win... I will be drunk as a fucking skunk on aggy tears.  I hope I can make it back to Indy that hammered on their misery.

Posted
1 hour ago, Js1 said:

QBRUwithND

We recruit 'em, but you get to play 'em, cause we can sell 'em we just can't develop 'em.

fify

Posted
18 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

I thought that bit about Rip Torn seemed wrong.  More Aggie stolen valor.

Plus, they left out Beyonce.

My daughter (who’s at Texas now) also said Travis Scott spent a year or 2 at UT a few years ago.

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