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Post-Beard Game #4 - Texas @ Iowa State, 7pm, ESPN+


Js1

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21 minutes ago, Herpa Derpa said:

We will.

Enjoy displaying for the world to see that you're a little bitch afraid of big, bad Texas. Enjoy showing that midwest friendliness is as fraudulent as your claim to "5 Star Culture". Enjoy a football coach that cries like a pussy. Enjoy 11am games on ESPN+++ against Houston and Cincinnati for the rest of your fandom. Enjoy getting all worked up for another in-state ass kicking by a geriatric dinosaur and his regarded son. Enjoy your basketball program continue to be an irrelevant afterthought where any talented player immediately portals for true opportunity. Enjoy watching your baseball...oh wait, y'all bitched out of that once you realized you could never compete. Enjoy watching half-naked men grapple since you have to if you want to support an actual program with any chance of success. Enjoy waking up every morning, looking out the window to the Iowa horizon, and know that your entire existence depends on obese people sucking up your shitty syrup.

And finally, enjoy eating shit while Texas moves to bigger and better things and all you will have are the liars and heiffers that call Ames home. Or is it corral? Remember, all the smart and beautiful Iowans fled as soon as they could. Only the dregs are left these days, living off government subsidies and hand-outs. Sorry, but you won't be able to depend on Texas to line your pockets anymore. No more Bar La Tosca, it's back to double coupon night at Perkins for a date with your pasty doughgirl.

So, in the future, every time you find yourself driving down Duff Avenue past Texas Roadhouse, just nod and say, "Hello, Daddy. I miss you so much."

 

Boy, your butt hurt is obviously severe.  If you applied some ointment or cream, maybe you wouldn't be so cranky.  In the meantime, instead of continuing to cry about the nasty Big 12 refs or those mean old Iowa State players, you'd be better off just taking it like a man.    

  • Fuck You 4
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Actually, it's getting boring beating you guys all the time, although it continues to be fun beating a program that has such a high opinion of itself.  Texas, with its enormous athletic department budget and supposed 5 start talent, is like the weekend golfer who shows up with his $5,000 personally fitted clubs and then hits the driver 20 feet.  Texas is like the little girl who has to constantly be told she's pretty.  Texas is a cancer on any conference to which they belong, and the rest of the Big 12 is so happy that cancer will soon be removed. 
Enjoy the SEC.   

Dang!
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3 hours ago, Pope said:

Actually, it's getting boring beating you guys all the time, although it continues to be fun beating a program that has such a high opinion of itself.  Texas, with its enormous athletic department budget and supposed 5 start talent, is like the weekend golfer who shows up with his $5,000 personally fitted clubs and then hits the driver 20 feet.  Texas is like the little girl who has to constantly be told she's pretty.  Texas is a cancer on any conference to which they belong, and the rest of the Big 12 is so happy that cancer will soon be removed. 

Enjoy the SEC.   

Sounds like us leaving will be better for everyone.  Grateful that everything seems to be working out for all involved. 

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