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Becoming your parents


LoneStarBiker

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I refer to every child as Chief.  

But seriously, when did this happen?  I'm 45 and know the weather pattern for the next two weeks, don't know any names for the top 10 songs or who the bands are, tell my kids all the time "when I was your age", health talk about illnesses/injuries/medicines, choose my clothing for comfort rather than style, and other sh!t reserved for old fogies. 

Oh well, guess it happens.   

Always resisted "getting old" but seems to sneak up on ya' and then the next thing I know is I'm telling strangers "Defense wins Championships". 

Well it does. Right!

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10 minutes ago, Jhawk said:

My biggest determining factor when I went to get a new car in 2016 was the safety features.  I was 31, single, no kids or pets.  Safety features.

When our second kid was on our way (I was a man at that point), I didn't think twice about buying a minivan (since there was a potential for a third kid).

After a few weeks of having the minivan, I began thinking it would have been cool to have it 10-15 years earlier with no kids - we would have spent every weekend camping/fishing out of it.

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I will do everything in my power to not become my parents. I heard this quote last year and I say it all the time in context with them (with my wife) “Don’t let them make us become them.”

I wrote about “them” on the other site a few times. They do things that drive us nuts and it can cause us to get down on their level. I will not become my parents.

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21 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

When our second kid was on our way (I was a man at that point), I didn't think twice about buying a minivan (since there was a potential for a third kid).

After a few weeks of having the minivan, I began thinking it would have been cool to have it 10-15 years earlier with no kids - we would have spent every weekend camping/fishing out of it.

I used to do wheelies on my crotch rocket and play rugby.  I guess I'm not a tool anymore but I'm the biggest pussy I know.  I am often asked about stuff from younger peers or my fiancee and a very common reaction out of me isn't to deny I know anything about what is being asked or to admit that I know a ton about it but to say "That's a young man's game" and move on from the conversation.  Sure I've done drugs, drank too much, taken risks where they don't need to be taken.  I've done all that and have the scars to prove it.  But I'll be damned if I get involved with anything that "is a young man's game" again.  I'm still worn out from all the life I lived between 21 and 33 and that period ended 3 years ago.

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Mine can be summed up quite easily with soccer.

 

20 years ago, I was this guy—-“I’ll get u next time mothereffer.  You’d better watch your back.  I’ll beat your ass for slide tackling me from behind.”

After a brawl that started at my game last week, I’m all —-“What the hell is wrong with y’all?  It’s just a stupid game.  We’ve all got to go to work tomorrow.”

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1 hour ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Minivans get a bad rap.  They can be a very versatile vehicle, and short of getting a really sporty SUV most SUVs have no more sport than the minivan with less functionality. 

we have twins and I would like a wagon, wife doesn't get it and she loathes the idea of a minivan

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I will flip the topic a little.

"When your kids become you."

 

My oldest son is about 5 months into his first management role.  Once he started on the path to this type of role, we talk a lot about leadership and influencing others.  He says he just feels so dirty when he says something to his direct reports or even peers, "That was Dad talking"   

It's pretty damn gratifying when all the shit they thought you were out of your mind on, starts coming to fruition. When someone they respect or admire gave the same advice or sentiment you had shared, I love it when that expression of "Fuck me...you were right again." comes across their face.

Now that both of our boys are young men, this shit is fun.  No more arguments.  No more accountability, well, beyond basic family stuff; but no more chewing their ass for stupid stuff.  being a dad is awesomer than ever.

 

I never became like my parents, with regard to style or mannerisms.  My wife is a lot different than her folks too.  We kind of did our own thing learning as we went.

Edited by slorch
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3 hours ago, Bottlecap said:

why is this door open? are we trying to air condition the whole neighborhood?

"who didn't close the door on the icebox in the garage?  We don't drink hot beer..."

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My dad who had EE degree from Maryland and an ME from AFIT and worked on the hydrogen bomb and retired a full Colonel was so cheap that he calculated the sqft and how much it costs to ac the bathroom vs how much time we spent in there and decided that it wasn't cost effective to air condition the bathrooms in our home so even in the summer when it was 100 you had to sit there and shit and sweat.  I wonder if he was trying to make us all relive our time living in the Philippines.  If you left the bathroom door open "god dammit, how many times have I told you people to shut the fucking door.  were not acing the entire outside."

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5 hours ago, Jhawk said:

My biggest determining factor when I went to get a new car in 2016 was the safety features.  I was 31, single, no kids or pets.  Safety features.

Samesies on the car.  Never even gave it a 2nd thought before, but now I'm checking crash test ratings and cargo capacity. 

In a previous life I ran a 2-seater convertible as a primary car for half a decade.

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4 hours ago, Gene Parmesan said:

Minivans get a bad rap.  They can be a very versatile vehicle, and short of getting a really sporty SUV most SUVs have no more sport than the minivan with less functionality. 

 

3 hours ago, next2naus said:

we have twins and I would like a wagon, wife doesn't get it and she loathes the idea of a minivan

Vans are terrible and you should feel bad.

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38 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

You think becoming your parents is a bad thing when you're (notice correct spelling) in your 40's ????

Shit I turned 63 in February....wait until you become your grandparents.

 

Isn’t part of that zero self awareness?  Could you ever “really” know?

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I refer to every child as Chief.  
But seriously, when did this happen?  I'm 45 and know the weather pattern for the next two weeks, don't know any names for the top 10 songs or who the bands are, tell my kids all the time "when I was your age", health talk about illnesses/injuries/medicines, choose my clothing for comfort rather than style, and other sh!t reserved for old fogies. 
Oh well, guess it happens.   
Always resisted "getting old" but seems to sneak up on ya' and then the next thing I know is I'm telling strangers "Defense wins Championships". 
Well it does. Right!
I refer to every child as that lil bastard/sumbitch. I argue with my daughter about people she should know, because I know them.

Sent from my LG-D950 using Tapatalk

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7 minutes ago, PantsTent said:

I have a rain gauge.  So when my dad asks how much rain I got, I tell him.

I honestly thought every homeowner in Texas was supposed to have a rain gauge.  I did grow up watching Harold Taft.

 

 

Edited by Beau Vine
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11 hours ago, LoneStarBiker said:

I refer to every child as Chief.  

But seriously, when did this happen?  I'm 45 and know the weather pattern for the next two weeks, don't know any names for the top 10 songs or who the bands are, tell my kids all the time "when I was your age", health talk about illnesses/injuries/medicines, choose my clothing for comfort rather than style, and other sh!t reserved for old fogies. 

Oh well, guess it happens.   

Always resisted "getting old" but seems to sneak up on ya' and then the next thing I know is I'm telling strangers "Defense wins Championships". 

Well it does. Right!

This is just Stage 1. 

Stage 2 is when the roles truly reverse and you have to take care of your parents like they took care of you growing up.  

Stage 3 is when your kids grow up and become you.

Stage 4 (the last Stage) is when your kids have to take care of you as you took care of them growing up.

It all goes in cycles.

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14 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Samesies on the car.  Never even gave it a 2nd thought before, but now I'm checking crash test ratings and cargo capacity. 

In a previous life I ran a 2-seater convertible as a primary car for half a decade.

The Miata doesn’t make the man. The man makes the Miata. 

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14 hours ago, midtown said:

My dad who had EE degree from Maryland and an ME from AFIT and worked on the hydrogen bomb and retired a full Colonel was so cheap that he calculated the sqft and how much it costs to ac the bathroom vs how much time we spent in there and decided that it wasn't cost effective to air condition the bathrooms in our home so even in the summer when it was 100 you had to sit there and shit and sweat.  I wonder if he was trying to make us all relive our time living in the Philippines.  If you left the bathroom door open "god dammit, how many times have I told you people to shut the fucking door.  were not acing the entire outside."

my granddad's driveway sloped slightly into the garage. when he would get to the end of the driveway, he would turn off his green pinto (yes it was actually a pinto) and let it coast into the garage to save the gas.

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I have become the AC and lights Nazi

I'm constantly walking through the house turning the AC up and lights off. It drives me nuts 
The other thing I didn't understand as a kid that now I'm facing full on is cokes, Kids open a coke, take 2 drinks and set it down and never finish it.

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I went to bed at 9:30 last Saturday night.

I hate going to movie theaters now...I rather just wait until the movie comes out on on-demand.

Sunday afternoons are for napping.  When I was a kid, I would pester my dad mercilessly to do something on a Sunday afternoon (golf, go-cart track, anything) when all he wanted to do was get a nap in.  Now, I understand.

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One thing I have said to my wife a few times lately, her dad is always yelling at people for slamming doors (I think I probably slam doors). Lately, I feel like I’m doing the same thing with my kids. In and out all day Long this weekend. Slamming the fucking doors.

Sunday In the kitchen I look at her “now I get why your dad is always bitching about people slamming the damn doors.” [sLAM] “SLAMMING THOSE DOORS!”

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18 hours ago, kmac30 said:

One thing I have said to my wife a few times lately, her dad is always yelling at people for slamming doors (I think I probably slam doors). Lately, I feel like I’m doing the same thing with my kids. In and out all day Long this weekend. Slamming the fucking doors.

Sunday In the kitchen I look at her “now I get why your dad is always bitching about people slamming the damn doors.” [sLAM] “SLAMMING THOSE DOORS!”

Oh hell no, already told kids I'll take the door off the hinges if they slam it. They know I'm serious too, just had to do it once to put the fear in them.

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Oh hell no, already told kids I'll take the door off the hinges if they slam it. They know I'm serious too, just had to do it once to put the fear in them.

I would do this but it’s our back door. We had a talk and the next kid to slam a door is going to have a problem. They’re 6 and 4(x2) and still learning.
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