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Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread


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https://www.captiongenerator.com/2107502/SurlyHorns-Reacts-to-the-Coaching-Search Enable subtitles if you're watching embedded.  

Just got a text from my friend in the Bama program that Flood and Wiggins are going with Sark. It's done.

nope, reposding to other posters. You want an asshole? I'll show you an asshole I'm gonna lose to OU THIS many times   Texas fucking sucks now, and you ALLLLLLL know it. Good

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15 minutes ago, Randolph Duke said:

This.

No way in God's name we want Mike Stoops on the UT staff.

Someone needs to explain to Sark the saga of Tom Herman's Casey Horny mistake.

There are certain individuals the alumni cannot and will not support being on the school payroll. And not all are deemed odious for the same reason.

Fuck Bob Stoops. And the entire "Stoops family" brand.

Wait. When did Tom Herman get fired? I thought we were all told by the most knowledgeable poster on Surly repeatedly in a series of interminable, maniacal posts that there was no way he was going to be fired, and the Legislature would kill UT for it. 

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1 minute ago, Laxtonto said:

So it was a bad game of telephone and a Gump that wanted to get a scoop first...

 

Hey we heard Stoops has been one of Sarks choices at LB coach and all the other options have said no

Gump:Sark may hire Stoops!

Texas995ers: Stark is hiring Stoops?!?

Surly: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEE Kill CDC, burn down the stadium and kill Sark

CDC at 6 this morning when he woke up and is taking his morning shit: WTF are all of these angry emails abotu hiring Stoops? Call Sark..

Sark to CDC: WTF is wrong with people, IO ahve been trying to finish hiring Marve or Tosh all night and got our guy and are ready to annoucne this afternoon according to legal. Ill leak this to the press

Surly: YAY we did it... I got rid of Stoops!!

I think Surly deserves a round of applause for all our collective hard work in filing out the staff.

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1 minute ago, Huckleberry said:

How do you figure? If someone who is hiring for an open position has talked with multiple candidates and the hiring of one candidate falls through why would it take another week to hire candidate 2? You move to the next candidate, offer him the job, he says yes, he's hired.

It would only take a while if he'd only talked to one person about the job.

Sure, that's likely. I'm reaching for whatever I can to convince myself he wasn't about to do it.

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Just now, Burt Macklin said:

Wait. When did Tom Herman get fired? I thought we were all told repeatedly in a series of interminable, maniacal posts that there was no way he was going to be fired, and the Legislature would kill UT for it. 

I'm missing something here, aren't I?

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21 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

In an off the field role. I would take Stoops as a game film editor or something but keep him the fuck away from the players. 

I wouldn’t trust him to be the Fucking janitor

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21 minutes ago, Sir Ulrich said:

If its true that a deal was done then boosters blocked the hire then there is no way Tosh is the hire. You don't try to hire a bumbling idiot only to fall back onto a top 5 recruiter. In this case Marve probably gets announced sometime today

That literally just happened with Stoops/Kwiatkowski

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3 minutes ago, Laxtonto said:

So it was a bad game of telephone and a Gump that wanted to get a scoop first...

 

Hey we heard Stoops has been one of Sarks choices at LB coach and all the other options have said no

Gump:Sark may hire Stoops!

Texas995ers: Stark is hiring Stoops?!?

Surly: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEE Kill CDC, burn down the stadium and kill Sark

CDC at 6 this morning when he woke up and is taking his morning shit: WTF are all of these angry emails abotu hiring Stoops? Call Sark..

Sark to CDC: WTF is wrong with people, IO ahve been trying to finish hiring Marve or Tosh all night and got our guy and are ready to annoucne this afternoon according to legal. Ill leak this to the press

Surly: YAY we did it... I got rid of Stoops!!

I choose to blame CJ. 

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Can we please stop acting like TFB, FCB, or anyone else’s 9.95 sources are worth a shit?
 

These guys do nothing but add negativity to the Texas football program and embarrass the University, all for the sweet sweet prize of being first on Twitter.

Fuck them all. Lowlifes.

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9 minutes ago, Dijon Robinson said:

Gotta say, unless I missed it somewhere in the craziness, I'm a little disappointed we didn't at least get one prime CTJ rant out of this ten-hour rollercoaster

We did get a lot of middle fingers from him though

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10 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

"I'm sober now but I'm still stupid" is the worst victory lap I've ever seen.

I don't know. It is kind of sweet. I think I will go with "I'm not sober but I'm still stupid" after I beat everyone's ass in the 50 and take a Revenge of the Nerds style victory stroll around the stadium.

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41 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

If by ‚Äúblocked,‚ÄĚ Super K means Tex Pete took a shit in a box and dropped it off at¬†the Post Office to mail to Bellmont, he‚Äôs correct.¬†

Did you package it with the dump CJ figuratively took on your chest? That little bastard. 

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2 minutes ago, 9.95-ers suck ass said:

Can we please stop acting like TFB, FCB, or anyone else’s 9.95 sources are worth a shit?
 

These guys do nothing but add negativity to the Texas football program and embarrass the University, all for the sweet sweet prize of being first on Twitter.

Fuck them all. Lowlifes.

username checks out

 

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Just now, touchthemonolith said:

Maybe if it's Stoops he can give us some insight on how Riley runs his offense for the RRS?

Please, someone tell me something to justify this decision.

we already hired one dude (who was an offensive coach) to try and tell us this

unfortunately for Herman...

tenor.gif?itemid=5056977

 

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14 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

Officially sober. Still hope it happens just to watch y’all absolutely melt again.

You waking up this morning after defending the Stoops hire all night.

tenor.gif

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7 minutes ago, 9.95-ers suck ass said:

Can we please stop acting like TFB, FCB, or anyone else’s 9.95 sources are worth a shit?
 

These guys do nothing but add negativity to the Texas football program and embarrass the University, all for the sweet sweet prize of being first on Twitter.

Fuck them all. Lowlifes.

The fact that you created this sock to say this and didn’t have the balls to do it under your primary screen name is the most embarrassing aspect of this subject.

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6 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Anyone willing to believe that this was just a hoax or trial balloon is a fucking idiot. This fucking clown was hired and the money revolted, and they should have. And I don't mean, one BMD had a problem. Since last night, shit apparently went fucking nuts for CDC and Hartzell, and it should have.

...

This was an orchestrated hire by Sarkisian, and it is a fucking problem. We saw Strong do this with Shawn Watson. Herman hired Horny, but he wasn't trying to pull one over. He was just oblivious and wound up surprised that there was blowback but stuck with his guy anyway. I am sick and fucking tired of watching average intelligence-level men elevated to a position of power and feeling like they can do whatever the fuck they want, even with an entire fanbase in revolt, because they think they're smarter than everybody else.

Gordon Ramsay Wow GIF by FOX TV

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4 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Anyone willing to believe that this was just a hoax or trial balloon is a fucking idiot. This fucking clown was hired and the money revolted, and they should have. And I don't mean, one BMD had a problem. Since last night, shit apparently went fucking nuts for CDC and Hartzell, and it should have.

I just went through about 10 pages happily negging any idiot trying to rationalize the Stoops hire. @Hank_Hill and @closetohumping were stars of the show with their abject stupidity on the pages from 285-292/3. Just some epically bad shit. I thought watching people defend the Watson hire at the time, or the Horny hire ("oh Shaggy posters, what's the big deal with hiring a rape orchestrator anyway?"), or the Valai hire was nauseating and unbelievable, but there were actually people on this thread basically already parroting "trust Sark". No thanks. 

This was an orchestrated hire by Sarkisian, and it is a fucking problem. We saw Strong do this with Shawn Watson. Herman hired Horny, but he wasn't trying to pull one over. He was just oblivious and wound up surprised that there was blowback but stuck with his guy anyway. I am sick and fucking tired of watching average intelligence-level men elevated to a position of power and feeling like they can do whatever the fuck they want, even with an entire fanbase in revolt, because they think they're smarter than everybody else.

Football isn't a complicated enterprise. Tracking coaching personnel and performance isn't complicated either. There are mountains of information freely available regarding these coaches and their work history and personal lives. We don't have access to what happens inside a program's walls, but that's it for the limits. People funding this fucking enterprise and making Sarkisian, Strong, and Herman rich beyond their wildest dreams aren't morons or clueless. Almost everyone involved is smarter than any one of those three imbeciles. Fuck Sarkisian for this stupid shit and fuck any of you willing to play the clown and buy into the premise that the dude didn't have an offer. Fuck Del Conte for letting his idiot employee attempt to pull this off, especially after they both were counseled weeks ago that Stoops couldn't be a part of the fucking plan. Going through motherfucking Zooms and kissing babies all the while knowing you were going to show us with your last hire. Motherfucking shitbag.

Tough break for @OnAComputer and his boys, as having Stoops inside the walls of Bellmont would have been a real coup for them.

 

image.gif.0efce42fc967a45bd717e7b110ed91f1.gif

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1 minute ago, Newy25 said:

I did not read this thread after last night because I was too depressed. Did we really Schiano this thing or is he really going to be a coach at Texas? 

He got Schiano'd

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11 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Anyone willing to believe that this was just a hoax or trial balloon is a fucking idiot. This fucking clown was hired and the money revolted, and they should have. And I don't mean, one BMD had a problem. Since last night, shit apparently went fucking nuts for CDC and Hartzell, and it should have.

I just went through about 10 pages happily negging any idiot trying to rationalize the Stoops hire. @Hank_Hill and @closetohumping were stars of the show with their abject stupidity on the pages from 285-292/3. Just some epically bad shit. I thought watching people defend the Watson hire at the time, or the Horny hire ("oh Shaggy posters, what's the big deal with hiring a rape orchestrator anyway?"), or the Valai hire was nauseating and unbelievable, but there were actually people on this thread basically already parroting "trust Sark". No thanks. 

This was an orchestrated hire by Sarkisian, and it is a fucking problem. We saw Strong do this with Shawn Watson. Herman hired Horny, but he wasn't trying to pull one over. He was just oblivious and wound up surprised that there was blowback but stuck with his guy anyway. I am sick and fucking tired of watching average intelligence-level men elevated to a position of power and feeling like they can do whatever the fuck they want, even with an entire fanbase in revolt, because they think they're smarter than everybody else.

Football isn't a complicated enterprise. Tracking coaching personnel and performance isn't complicated either. There are mountains of information freely available regarding these coaches and their work history and personal lives. We don't have access to what happens inside a program's walls, but that's it for the limits. People funding this fucking enterprise and making Sarkisian, Strong, and Herman rich beyond their wildest dreams aren't morons or clueless. Almost everyone involved is smarter than any one of those three imbeciles. Fuck Sarkisian for this stupid shit and fuck any of you willing to play the clown and buy into the premise that the dude didn't have an offer. Fuck Del Conte for letting his idiot employee attempt to pull this off, especially after they both were counseled weeks ago that Stoops couldn't be a part of the fucking plan. Going through motherfucking Zooms and kissing babies all the while knowing you were going to show us with your last hire. Motherfucking shitbag.

Tough break for @OnAComputer and his boys, as having Stoops inside the walls of Bellmont would have been a real coup for them.

 

On the bright side, Sark didn't double down.

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11 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Anyone willing to believe that this was just a hoax or trial balloon is a fucking idiot. This fucking clown was hired and the money revolted, and they should have. And I don't mean, one BMD had a problem. Since last night, shit apparently went fucking nuts for CDC and Hartzell, and it should have.

I just went through about 10 pages happily negging any idiot trying to rationalize the Stoops hire. @Hank_Hill and @closetohumping were stars of the show with their abject stupidity on the pages from 285-292/3. Just some epically bad shit. I thought watching people defend the Watson hire at the time, or the Horny hire ("oh Shaggy posters, what's the big deal with hiring a rape orchestrator anyway?"), or the Valai hire was nauseating and unbelievable, but there were actually people on this thread basically already parroting "trust Sark". No thanks. 

This was an orchestrated hire by Sarkisian, and it is a fucking problem. We saw Strong do this with Shawn Watson. Herman hired Horny, but he wasn't trying to pull one over. He was just oblivious and wound up surprised that there was blowback but stuck with his guy anyway. I am sick and fucking tired of watching average intelligence-level men elevated to a position of power and feeling like they can do whatever the fuck they want, even with an entire fanbase in revolt, because they think they're smarter than everybody else.

Football isn't a complicated enterprise. Tracking coaching personnel and performance isn't complicated either. There are mountains of information freely available regarding these coaches and their work history and personal lives. We don't have access to what happens inside a program's walls, but that's it for the limits. People funding this fucking enterprise and making Sarkisian, Strong, and Herman rich beyond their wildest dreams aren't morons or clueless. Almost everyone involved is smarter than any one of those three imbeciles. Fuck Sarkisian for this stupid shit and fuck any of you willing to play the clown and buy into the premise that the dude didn't have an offer. Fuck Del Conte for letting his idiot employee attempt to pull this off, especially after they both were counseled weeks ago that Stoops couldn't be a part of the fucking plan. Going through motherfucking Zooms and kissing babies all the while knowing you were going to show us with your last hire. Motherfucking shitbag.

Tough break for @OnAComputer and his boys, as having Stoops inside the walls of Bellmont would have been a real coup for them.

 

yep they lost my trust trying to pull this shit.  this isn't good.  mike fucking stoops man.  are you fucking kidding me, it made my blood boil when i read it last night.  fucking asshole.

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1 minute ago, Newy25 said:

I did not read this thread after last night because I was too depressed. Did we really Schiano this thing or is he really going to be a coach at Texas? 

schiano'd

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