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Terrible White People Baby Names


MaybeACoordinator

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It's not like white people have a market on lame-o baby names, however I have a lot more respect for a parent naming their kid D'Brickashaw or Trendavious than I do for parents naming their kid Cash or Rumor.  To me, kooky black folk names is a part of their culture, whereas white folks are just trying to be clever or cool.  

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2 hours ago, Lhorn said:

It's not like white people have a market on lame-o baby names, however I have a lot more respect for a parent naming their kid D'Brickashaw or Trendavious than I do for parents naming their kid Cash or Rumor.  To me, kooky black folk names is a part of their culture, whereas white folks are just trying to be clever or cool.  

Like I said, so are the white people.  But just like we aren’t as good at dancing, we’re not as creative in the naming department 

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17 hours ago, Hornius Emeritus said:

 

There was never a Ura Hogg.

I shot a rodeo in Post, Texas, about 8 years ago.  I'm sitting here looking at a list of riders in the bronc busting competition. Eight of the 17 riders was named Cody.  That's almost 50%.

Only serious bull rider I've met was named Robson. But I did dabble in some bull riding in college and there was a Cody. Also a guy who went by Midnight.

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11 hours ago, Lhorn said:

It's not like white people have a market on lame-o baby names, however I have a lot more respect for a parent naming their kid D'Brickashaw or Trendavious than I do for parents naming their kid Cash or Rumor.  To me, kooky black folk names is a part of their culture, whereas white folks are just trying to be clever or cool.  

Speaking of names that are part of the culture, we have names like Muffy, Buffy, Pippa, Bitsy, Izzy, Mimi, Sissy, Missy, Bunny and Tibby.  

(Please, when reading or saying these names aloud, please sit up straight and have your right pinky finger fully extended.  Thank you.)

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20 minutes ago, Stella Link said:

Speaking of names that are part of the culture, we have names like Muffy, Buffy, Pippa, Bitsy, Izzy, Mimi, Sissy, Missy, Bunny and Tibby.  

(Please, when reading or saying these names aloud, please sit up straight and have your right pinky finger fully extended.  Thank you.)

"You're name's Lebowski, Lebowski...Your wife is Bunny" 

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12 hours ago, Lhorn said:

It's not like white people have a market on lame-o baby names, however I have a lot more respect for a parent naming their kid D'Brickashaw or Trendavious than I do for parents naming their kid Cash or Rumor.  To me, kooky black folk names is a part of their culture, whereas white folks are just trying to be clever or cool.  

But if your last name is Money, you are basically required to name at least one of your kids Cash. 

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31 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

Played baseball against a dude in HS whose name was Cash Barr.  

Kinda describes the wedding reception they never actually had.  

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13 hours ago, Lhorn said:

It's not like white people have a market on lame-o baby names, however I have a lot more respect for a parent naming their kid D'Brickashaw or Trendavious than I do for parents naming their kid Cash or Rumor.  To me, kooky black folk names is a part of their culture, whereas white folks are just trying to be clever or cool.  

Obligatory:

And for good measure:

 

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21 hours ago, HRSchenker said:

I know 6 kids named Jaxon and 4 kids named Kinsler. The weirdest name I've ever heard was a girl whose first and last name is Taylor. Taylor Taylor lol

*slight derail...had a best friend years ago named John Linda, who married Linda Handleman, hence she became Linda Linda...derail over*

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21 hours ago, David Dennison said:

Tiffany, Heather, Cody, Dylan, Dermot, Jordan, Taylor, Brittany, Wesley, Rumer, Scout, Cassidy, Zoe, Chloe, Max, Hunter, Kendall, Kaitlin, Noah, Sasha, Morgan, Kyra, Ian, Lauren, Qbert, and Phil.

Fuck you, you wanker.

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1 hour ago, MAROON said:

House in our neighborhood with all three of their son's All Star little league signs in the front yard....Jayan, Milan, Chetan.......poor kids.

You gotta be Chetan me...

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2 hours ago, MAROON said:

House in our neighborhood with all three of their son's All Star little league signs in the front yard....Jayan, Milan, Chetan.......poor kids.

Blame it on your Milan Chetan, cold dead beatin, two timing double-dealing, mean mistreating Jayan heart 

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Back in the 90s a coworker named her kid Hunter. No biggy. But then she would go ballistic if you pronounced it Normal 'Merican Style, which is more like "Hunder" or "Hunner", nobody spits out that crisp "T" on this side of the Atlantic.

She would. "Hun-TER! It's Hun-TER," with a little faux-British accent.

Bet Hun-TER got his ass whooped, a lot.

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On 8/15/2018 at 8:08 AM, MaybeACoordinator said:

Yeah, this is in Utah, but names in the exurbs of big Texas cities are just as bad.

 

Preslee. Madolin. Kolten. Atylee. Mekeli. Paityn. Kyson. Taeber. Saydee. Makinlee. Haleigh. Braylin. Syrie. Madisyn. Kirtlyn. Madysen. Aeryn. Taiten. Taycie. Gambit. Aroarin. Braxton. Macady. Maycee. Jaxon. Ryker. Jaxon. Jr. Laycee. Taeton. 

Some likely Mormon family named their kid Eros....WTF. 

 

 

My middle girls name. She’s by far the coolest of the three and sends a fuck you your way.  Also, didn’t think it was that odd of a name?  It’s not really spelled intentionally difficult like a lot of the others your mention. 

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3 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:

Back in the 90s a coworker named her kid Hunter. No biggy. But then she would go ballistic if you pronounced it Normal 'Merican Style, which is more like "Hunder" or "Hunner", nobody spits out that crisp "T" on this side of the Atlantic.

She would. "Hun-TER! It's Hun-TER," with a little faux-British accent.

Bet Hun-TER got his ass whooped, a lot.

My ex-sister in law had a son, they decided on Hunter for the name. Their last name also started with an H, so I tried like hell to talk her into giving him a middle name that started with H, so we could call him Triple H. She decided to give him her maiden name as his middle name, like he was an 18th century politician. What a fucking waste. 

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19 minutes ago, Sandman said:

My ex-sister in law had a son, they decided on Hunter for the name. Their last name also started with an H, so I tried like hell to talk her into giving him a middle name that started with H, so we could call him Triple H. She decided to give him her maiden name as his middle name, like he was an 18th century politician. What a fucking waste. 

Just take the middle name she gave him, and pronounce it with am H.

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7 hours ago, fattyflattie said:

My middle girls name. She’s by far the coolest of the three and sends a fuck you your way.  Also, didn’t think it was that odd of a name?  It’s not really spelled intentionally difficult like a lot of the others your mention. 

nobody gonna jump on this one? 

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They've taken down his Baylor bio, but Kendal Briles's kids have some amazing names. (They are not in his UH bio.)
Wiki says they are named Kinley and Jaytn.
KENDAL BRILES. Hometown, Abilene, Texas. College, Houston, 2006. Family, wife, Sarah children, Jaytn, Kru & Kinley.
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