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Terrible White People Baby Names


MaybeACoordinator

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2 hours ago, woohorn said:

I'm gonna name my first son Scotch. Whadda ya think?

My wife named the cat Ginger. When the cat got lost, she walked around the neighborhood. "Gin! Gin Gin!"

Sounded like a girl on a bender.

When my wife got back home I was on the porch with an extension cord and the electric can opener and Ginger and about fifteen other cats. 

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Baby naming is out of control and we will be lucky to live through it. The 2000’s were the era of “any name that rhymes with -ayden”. We considered naming our our son in 2017 Jack (not Jackson, Jaxon, Jacksyn, etc.) or Elijah but these assholes have trendi-fied and corrupted many of the old school names. Henry, George, Oliver, etc. I’m guessing 20% of males in his graduating class will be some form of Jackson or Jack though. 

I am good friends with a girl in her 30s named Maude and her sister is named Ruth. Her mom was a hippie. 

 

Jaxon+Shipley+TCU+v+Texas+hq3KzYzFjk_l.j

“Why has Shaggy forsaken me?” - Jaxon. 

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40 minutes ago, Murfdogg21 said:

Baby naming is out of control and we will be lucky to live through it. The 2000’s were the era of “any name that rhymes with -ayden”. We considered naming our our son in 2017 Jack (not Jackson, Jaxon, Jacksyn, etc.) or Elijah but these assholes have trendi-fied and corrupted many of the old school names. Henry, George, Oliver, etc.

if you want to take it back, you have to take it back-back.

 

Yaqoob.  Yousuf.  Ishaq.  Ishmael.  lest we not forget... nebuchadnezzar

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54 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

if you want to take it back, you have to take it back-back.

 

Yaqoob.  Yousuf.  Ishaq.  Ishmael.  lest we not forget... nebuchadnezzar

The boy name we picked was Jacob.  I would have pronounced it Yaqoob just to annoy my wife.  We had two girls and she would go with naming the second one Jacob.

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11 hours ago, Stella Link said:

No.  Strippers will always be named Brandy, Crystal, Tiffany, Amber, Candy, Cherry, Bambi, Star, Diamond, Lexie, Roxy, Chyna and Trixie.

There was a girl in my freshman orientation camp in our small group thing named Bambi. Not sure if she ended up being a stripper, but she was exactly the kind of girl who you would expect to be one.

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26 minutes ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

There was a girl in my freshman orientation camp in our small group thing named Bambi. Not sure if she ended up being a stripper, but she was exactly the kind of girl who you would expect to be one.

Must be one of those girls that follows Jason Aldean around the country on tour.  

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3 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I really hope that "Kru" rhymes with "duh." 

Somewhere a body spray for roid ragers with iced tips is looking for its name.

1 hour ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

There was a girl in my freshman orientation camp in our small group thing named Bambi. Not sure if she ended up being a stripper, but she was exactly the kind of girl who you would expect to be one.

Beaumont Kelly had twins on their cheerleading team named Fantasy and Ecstasy. I was shocked when A) they got into UT; and B) they were able to join a top five sorority. 

What's not so shocking: they was pure smoke. It was even more worth taking a detour through the cheerleaders if you got run out of bounds against Kelly than other teams. 

 

EDIT: Googled her up and it looks like I made up the Ecstasy part. Her twin's actual name is Dynasy. Not Dynasty, apparently. 

Edited by MaybeACoordinator
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5 hours ago, Murfdogg21 said:

Baby naming is out of control and we will be lucky to live through it. The 2000’s were the era of “any name that rhymes with -ayden”. We considered naming our our son in 2017 Jack (not Jackson, Jaxon, Jacksyn, etc.) or Elijah but these assholes have trendi-fied and corrupted many of the old school names. Henry, George, Oliver, etc. I’m guessing 20% of males in his graduating class will be some form of Jackson or Jack though. 

I am good friends with a girl in her 30s named Maude and her sister is named Ruth. Her mom was a hippie. 

“Why has Shaggy forsaken me?” - Jaxon. 

yeah, and i gotta tell you, fuck all these people who took my shit and made it super popular. how did i get caught up in all this?

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8 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Public flickr, pic from 1994. Dynasy is on the left, Fantasy is the bride. Dynasy isn't quite as hot as I remember her being. Dude in the white coat's name is Ash, which was kind of a forerunner to this current plague of names. 

 

1994-002

 

Sure that wasn’t short for Shadynasty?

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1 hour ago, Murfdogg21 said:

Sure that wasn’t short for Shadynasty?

Fantasy and Dynasy they wear them cut off britches and those skinny little halters
And they're second cousins to me
Man I don't care I want to get between 'em
With a great big ol' hard on like a old bois d' arc fence post
You could hang a pipe rail gait from 
Do some twisted sisters 'til the cows come home 
And we'd be havin' us a time

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Public flickr, pic from 1994. Dynasy is on the left, Fantasy is the bride. Dynasy isn't quite as hot as I remember her being. Dude in the white coat's name is Ash, which was kind of a forerunner to this current plague of names. 
 
3845234925_b620089e47_b.jpg  


Grandpa on the left looks like a former mobster in the Witness Protection program. Beaumont resident with a Bronx accent.

Carry on
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My first cousin's first cousin (opposite side of the family) was named Zebulon William Williams. Was close enough to attend his funeral a couple of years ago, died from a heroin overdose in Cleburne, Texas. Daughter picked the music for the funeral and played Guns and Roses' Mister Brownstone, I shit you not. 

 

CHIEF

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31 minutes ago, CHIEF said:

My first cousin's first cousin (opposite side of the family) was named Zebulon William Williams. Was close enough to attend his funeral a couple of years ago, died from a heroin overdose in Cleburne, Texas. Daughter picked the music for the funeral and played Guns and Roses' Mister Brownstone, I shit you not. 

 

CHIEF

JoCo MoFo.  Lots a shit happens in JoCo 

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2 hours ago, CHIEF said:

My first cousin's first cousin (opposite side of the family) was named Zebulon William Williams. Was close enough to attend his funeral a couple of years ago, died from a heroin overdose in Cleburne, Texas. Daughter picked the music for the funeral and played Guns and Roses' Mister Brownstone, I shit you not. 

 

CHIEF

Now he gets up around never

he used to get up on time

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21 hours ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

I love her hearing a mom discuss how she can't believe that her son or daughter shares a name with 3 other kids in their classroom of 30.  Shatters the mom's plan of such an unique name.   But he's the only one that spells Jackson as Jaksun so he's still a precious snowflake.

It's a weird hive mind phenomenon. People seem to spontaneously pick names they think will be unique from baby name books and keep on believing they are unique until the first day of pre-K and then bang: a dozen Roses, a herd of Jacobs. Ex and I barely avoided that with both of our kids -- pretty much all our rejected shortlisted names were the ones everyone else wound up using, so we were always relieved to have named our daughter Hortense and our son Cnut. 

 

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