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A story about a pathetic man's downfall


Francisco 2.0

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Robert E. Lee got beat by a drunkard.
And the North wasn't even fully deployed - shit they were fighting with one hand tied behind their back, and even Lee admitted that - while the North had twice as many men in the military as the South, the North still had a population of 22 million people to draw on, while the South had 9 million (4 million of which were slaves).  The North had millions more men to draw upon, while the South couldn't have gone too deep into their bench, without creating a situation where some serious slave revolts would fucking wreck them.
Only in the mind of a fucking loser like Trump could the South have won.
 

South had DC in its crosshairs several times. Also, the Union had morale and financial woes. Many different scenarios where the Union is forced to give up the War. The South wins Gettysburg and maybe Lincoln doesnt get a 2nd term.

And Grant was a badass. He suffered greatly from incompetent generals he had to purge. And rarely drunk during combat.
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2 hours ago, Lobo said:

"And except for Gettysburg, would have won the war"  Yeah, damn shame about those pesky decisive large battles that swing a war one way or the other.  If not for Normandy, Hitler would have won his war.  

I do have great admiration for the strategic and tactical prowess of General Lee.  However, there are a number of brilliant field marshals to whom we have no statues erected.  You know...because they fucking lost.  There are no statues to Heinz Guderian whose tenure lasted longer than Lee's.  Because it turns out, he was an asshole.  And he lost.  You can't be both and get statues.  According to a rule about bronze I've just made up.  

Do you have a flag?

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We don't need a bloody flag.  We live here.  

 

When you stop laughing at Izzard.  And you really stop and think about it.  I don't mean to get all Pinto stoned in Animal House here, but think about how fucking strange the concept of a flag is nowadays.  For centuries they were needed because you just really didn't know who the fuck that other group was on the other side of that ridge.  But in this day and age to wave Trump flags, or Confederate flags, from your home/truck/boat...it's just bizarre to me.  I can tell your alliances the moment you open your mouth, you didn't have to spend $300 on banners.

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13 hours ago, Bojack said:

I can't remember a boxing match since Fury, Wilder 2 that wasn't some youtuber vs a has been mma fighter.  Commentators are baked off their asses, rambling pure nonsense.  This weekend's main event features a 58 year old man stepping up on short notice.  The co-main event is two 46 year old mma fighters.  I thought that was rock bottom even for the sport of boxing that's been a joke for decades.  Now former President of the United States and soft punk insurrectionist Donald Trump and his loser son will be part of the broadcast.  All this on the 20th anniversary of 9/11.  We've plummeted straight past Idiocracy.  

b0d6a589-1ff5-4067-9247-24a3c60caa9a_tex

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3 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:

I say we put giant Confederate General statues in every town, and not tell anybody that they are actually robots that, activated by Maga hats and Trump flags, will wade into crowds indiscriminately scything down mortals with verdigris-crusted over-sized sabers.

I feel like this is something Robot Chicken could accomplish in one of their shows.

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Half the people who served under him from Tillerson to Bolton to Grisham have told incredibly disturbing first-hand accounts of this man's recklessness and idiocy.  All it does it reinforce what 65% of the nation's adults knew.  And just causes the 35% of folks over 18 in the U.S., to fall more deeply in love with him.  Wisely, Trump either doubles down on the accusation and say that's the hallmark of a great leader or he calls it fake and discredits the person as a jealous incompetent.  Either way, he stays squeaky clean in their eyes.  None of this shit moves the needle.  

The only thing that gives me comfort is history will be sublimely unkind to Trump.  That won't bother him, but eventually children will read about him and ask their parents about it, and it will make for some very awkward (but necessary) kitchen table conversations.  

His death will also mark the only time in recent U.S. history where a good portion of the nation will be openly celebrating his death.  The deaths of past Presidents is typically a unifying event in our nation.  Even when Nixon died, some talking heads vilified his tenure...but nobody smiled or toasted his demise.  I think there will be spontaneous parties in the streets of American cities when the announcement is made.  Nothing official, but organically driven mass gatherings to embrace and regale.  Kinda like when they announced Bin Laden was dead.  I think people will gather at capitals and town squares all across America and rejoice.  Most will stay home in good taste and give thanks privately.  But I'm betting the number of citizens mass gatherings to celebrate his death will number in the hundreds of thousands...if not millions.  And the number of mass shootings that week will be an all-time American record.  His body will lie in state at the U.S. Capitol, the building he attempted to have burned to the ground.  And the line to pay respects will only be surpassed by the line to piss on his grave. 

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25 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Wisely, Trump either doubles down on the accusation and say that's the hallmark of a great leader or he calls it fake and discredits the person as a jealous incompetent. 

False.  He doesn't do "either" -- he does BOTH.  "Yeah, I did that and that makes me awesome.  Also, I didn't do that, and the person who says I did is a liar and I never heard of her."  And here's the kicker -- his cult BELIEVES BOTH utterly inconsistent statements.  Because the stupidity.....it's become its own sentient being.

26 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I think people will gather at capitals and town squares all across America and rejoice.  Most will stay home in good taste and give thanks privately.  But I'm betting the number of citizens mass gatherings to celebrate his death will number in the hundreds of thousands...if not millions. 

Count me in those millions.  I will 100% be out in the streets.  Honking the car horn, shooting off fireworks, flying our American flag, popping champagne and handing out glasses to strangers, all that shit.

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1 hour ago, Lobo said:

Half the people who served under him from Tillerson to Bolton to Grisham have told incredibly disturbing first-hand accounts of this man's recklessness and idiocy.  All it does it reinforce what 65% of the nation's adults knew.  And just causes the 35% of folks over 18 in the U.S., to fall more deeply in love with him.  Wisely, Trump either doubles down on the accusation and say that's the hallmark of a great leader or he calls it fake and discredits the person as a jealous incompetent.  Either way, he stays squeaky clean in their eyes.  None of this shit moves the needle.  

The only thing that gives me comfort is history will be sublimely unkind to Trump.  That won't bother him, but eventually children will read about him and ask their parents about it, and it will make for some very awkward (but necessary) kitchen table conversations.  

His death will also mark the only time in recent U.S. history where a good portion of the nation will be openly celebrating his death.  The deaths of past Presidents is typically a unifying event in our nation.  Even when Nixon died, some talking heads vilified his tenure...but nobody smiled or toasted his demise.  I think there will be spontaneous parties in the streets of American cities when the announcement is made.  Nothing official, but organically driven mass gatherings to embrace and regale.  Kinda like when they announced Bin Laden was dead.  I think people will gather at capitals and town squares all across America and rejoice.  Most will stay home in good taste and give thanks privately.  But I'm betting the number of citizens mass gatherings to celebrate his death will number in the hundreds of thousands...if not millions.  And the number of mass shootings that week will be an all-time American record.  His body will lie in state at the U.S. Capitol, the building he attempted to have burned to the ground.  And the line to pay respects will only be surpassed by the line to piss on his grave. 

all of this assumes we pull out of this nosedive.  

homer/bart meme:

he was the low point of our country's existence.

he was the low point so far.

 

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7 hours ago, Macanudo said:

The only way his body will lay in state at the Rotunda is if his family and/or the Trump Organization gets permission to charge an entrance fee.  Otherwise, they'll put him at Bedminster or Mar-A-Lago where they can charge the Trumpkins.

 

100% correct and don jr will say the libs refused his father the honor of laying in the rotunda

 

also, when's he signing his big book deal ?

when does the planning start for the trump library ?

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9 hours ago, Mo Horn said:

This could be fun. Maybe at least we'll finally hear why she spent several days in the hospital. 

The publisher pays for this kind of article to generate buzz so people buy the book. If it was worth a shit, it would have already been leaked. 

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12 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

The publisher pays for this kind of article to generate buzz so people buy the book. If it was worth a shit, it would have already been leaked. 

I don't think they pay for it, but they do strategically leak things like this.  And yeah, I don't think this is going to reveal much that is politically or legally very scandalous, but it will be a ton of gossip-rag fodder.

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22 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

Robert E. Lee got beat by a drunkard.

And the North wasn't even fully deployed - shit they were fighting with one hand tied behind their back, and even Lee admitted that - while the North had twice as many men in the military as the South, the North still had a population of 22 million people to draw on, while the South had 9 million (4 million of which were slaves).  The North had millions more men to draw upon, while the South couldn't have gone too deep into their bench, without creating a situation where some serious slave revolts would fucking wreck them.

Only in the mind of a fucking loser like Trump could the South have won.

 

Nah they could have won. Lee hesitated on the way to Gettysburg and let Meade get the high ground. This was partly because his “eyes” were out joyriding instead of scouting, but also he was just old and slow. Get the high ground and they might route Meade then run down, take DC and force a peace settlement. Had it worked it would have been one of the most brilliant plans ever. 
 

But Lee was tentative, got there late, then instead of retreating when his forces were repeatedly repelled, broke his army on Cemetery Hill. 
 

After that the end result was a foregone conclusion for the reasons you list

 

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31 minutes ago, Sawbonz said:

Nah they could have won. Lee hesitated on the way to Gettysburg and let Meade get the high ground. This was partly because his “eyes” were out joyriding instead of scouting, but also he was just old and slow. Get the high ground and they might route Meade then run down, take DC and force a peace settlement. Had it worked it would have been one of the most brilliant plans ever. 
 

But Lee was tentative, got there late, then instead of retreating when his forces were repeatedly repelled, broke his army on Cemetery Hill. 
 

After that the end result was a foregone conclusion for the reasons you list

 

high ground GIF

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Nah they could have won. Lee hesitated on the way to Gettysburg and let Meade get the high ground. This was partly because his “eyes” were out joyriding instead of scouting, but also he was just old and slow. Get the high ground and they might route Meade then run down, take DC and force a peace settlement. Had it worked it would have been one of the most brilliant plans ever. 
 
But Lee was tentative, got there late, then instead of retreating when his forces were repeatedly repelled, broke his army on Cemetery Hill. 
 
After that the end result was a foregone conclusion for the reasons you list
 

Until Grant took over, the Rebs could have still sapped the Union’s morale. They didnt need to win, just force a stalemate, help Lincoln lose an election, and force a settlement.

Grant was largely responsible for seizing control over the Mississippi, Tennessee, then activating Total War against the South. His capturing was Vicksburg simultaneously with Gettysburg was probably the more strategic victory. And Meade letting Lee have a safe retreat was a blunder.

Grant took over a beleaguered Army of the Potomac who were mismanaged and gunshy. He deployed Sheridan and Sherman to beat the shit out of non-Lee forces.

Grant mostly occupied Lee’s Army, knowing he just needed to bide his time and keep Lee in Virginia, boxing him in until the surrender at Appomattox. Grant knew Lee’s weakness was a soft spot for Richmond and Virginia.

Regarding Trump’s revision that Lee was a unifying force after the war, that was largely bullshit. Lee helped propagate the Lost Cause myth. And there was plenty of evidence of his pro-slavery actions and rejection of Reconstruction.

Lee was a genius, he was not slow, and it would have been great if he wasn’t a traitor and honored his oath to the United States throughout his life. The Civil War would have gone very differently and probably ended much earlier, saving countless lives.

If he were in charge of the military today, he would fire all African-American officers and have killed Osama Bin Laden in Tora Bora.
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4 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Guess no one wanted his sorry ass near any of these 9/11 Ceremonies?  

Clinton/Obama doing something with Pres Biden in NYC. GWB is with VP Harris in Pennsylvania. 

Trump is doing boxing. Still so fucking rage inducing we elected this selfish man-baby president. 

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On 9/9/2021 at 9:57 PM, Eskimohorn said:

Until Grant took over, the Rebs could have still sapped the Union’s morale. They didnt need to win, just force a stalemate, help Lincoln lose an election, and force a settlement.

This is where it's at, the South wasn't going to crush the North militarily short of getting a B-52. But ironically, if Lincoln had been as ineffective a leader as Trump, I could see him losing the election to McClellan, and then a ton of Northern industrialists getting rich building factories and railroads in an "Independent" (broke-ass, trying to make payments to USA, Britain, and France so they didn't get Maximillianed) CSA.

As for Lee ending the war in a day if he took command of the US Army... attacking and winning in the rifled-musket days was hard. In real life, Lee had some problems accomplishing the mission in his first Civil War command, I believe in West Virginia. Who knows if he would have done better in charge of a raw Union Army coming south-- would he have gotten better, or been one of the almost-forgotten commanders that Lincoln sacked?

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12 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

 

 

Pretty spicy op-ed:

9/11 is still their day to feel and feed that sense of vengeance, except now Trump and his media cohorts are targeting their fellow Americans for an assorted list of offenses and manufactured outrages ranging from Covid-19 mask rules to teaching about slavery.

Whether or not Trump is building his base for a 2024 run, or is trying to maintain his status as a GOP power broker (it’s the former, and we all know it), his aim is the same: to speak to people’s worst instincts for his own purposes. That he is choosing an embarrassing sideshow of a boxing match in order to do this is an indictment of boxing itself. Famed boxing writer Jimmy Cannon once called boxing “the red light district of sports.” You can keep your speeches and crocodile tears. This is where Trump is truly at home.

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  • Bozo_Casanova changed the title to Poll: President Trump's Major Announcement


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