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Posted

Today I was hoping that I would have a great day and didn't have anything to worry about. I was gonna work from home, drop my kid off at school, wrap up my meetings by 4 and head to Sams to pick up the meat for tailgate. I didn't get any pictures...but the total weight of it was 181lbs. 4 Briskets avg 13lb, 5 pork butts avg 10.5lb, 12 racks avg 4lb, whole chicken wings - 36lbs. Thanks to @DalTxHornFanย who had a connect that would do it for $1/lb smoked on Saturday ready by 3PM. I said fuck yeah you got yourself a deal. Taking all the meat there and I'm on mopac headed up to far west where this place is. Tire makes noise like it blew up, I check tire pressure everything is fine (I've been putting off tires and this one has had a small leak for a month).ย 

GOD DAMNIT I have all this MEAT in my car!

So then I'm like fuck it I'm getting off on windsor and checking. I get under the car in the neighborhood and am looking and can't see anything. I get way under after lifting the suspension (air ride on the e63s)- there I saw a big strip of my inner tire just flopping down on the ground from about halfway up. Well I didn't have any scissors and it wasn't hitting anything except the wheel well a little bit I decided to limp it to the BBQ spot. 30 mph top speed up balcones all the way to far west. Get there and have all this meat. He looks at me all funny and is like that's a lot of meat, and I was like yeah do you have any box cutters or something like that I have a strip of tire I need to cut off and literally am laughing out loud at the absurdity of my life. I'm going to be late for Burnt Ends planning dinner at Fogo de chao 6PM reservation. I go outside while we wrestles this 180+ lbs of meat into the store, I cut off the strip of tire and go back inside. We confirmed the weights I ordered some beans and potato salad and they were happy to send me on my way. He may drop by tomorrow he likes to get hammered in a suite. very nice guys - he laughed in my face when I asked if they use post oak and just salt and pepper.

I'm now testing my tire for limp or highway duty. We have unlocked highway - air pressure steady, run flats, GPS says I'll get there right at 6 sharp on mopac. We send it, it's a smooth enough ride, get downtown get parked am inside by 6:03, Spencer Shannon is there to greet me. We say whats up, I tell him a story about how my back is fucked up cuz I was throwing my kids in the pool yesterday as I'm slamming water from the bar. We shoot the shit for like 5 minutes and the rest of the guys show up together. We all walk to our table and I sit in the middle, Jack Endries was like tell me about what Burnt Ends is - so I go into it all and tell them we are there to have fun and really feel out what they wanna do this season.

Emaree Winston and Jordan Washington immediately cutting up all over the place, Nick Townsend I don't think has ever done a churrascaria in his life, and the other guys were all so confused. Will Randle shows up late. We start the meat consumption process after a brief salad bar hit where the chicken salad was the clear winner. We talk about what they wanna do for this year and they seem fairly committed to doing a rap music video. They also wanna throw a sick party during a bye week and watch with fans. Then they wanna promote the tailgate and make the whole thing a merch line etc. They see the potential of the program and wanna push it.

I teased Jordan Washington about not tackling the guy after the INT as something he was getting yelled at by the coach for. He laughed at me and said that guy that intercepted it was really fast. hahaha

He got me back later in dinner when the lady came around for dessert he told her it was my birthday. I told them they can't just pick on me because I'm old and he persisted. They brought out my delicious birthday tres leches cake with a candle in it. They all sang me happy birthday really loud in a not loud or busy fogo de chao. I blow out the candle and Jordan Washington stops recording, I said oh man you aren't gonna record my wish? He goes well what is your wish? I said "I wish arch manning didn't have the yips" they all died laughing.

We talked about a bunch of random stuff, they talked about wanting the rowing team to be their rap video girls and scheming where we are gonna film and what the bars are gonna be. They are wanting to have fun with the program and really make it a lot more of their personality.ย 

Emaree asked me if I liked doing this stuff and I gave him a sort of long winded answer that was about I've got a lot on my plate, but I'm really glad to be able to do it. We promptly changed the discussion to the new iphone 17 Pro Max orange and that he was gonna trade in his iphone 16 tomorrow before reporting to the hotel in the evening. then I took his ice cream away because he is 'over weight' every day, everyone laughed and he asked for his ice cream back in a mock pleading type of way and I gave it back.ย 

They are all excited to promote the tailgate and I'll give updates as soon as I have them.

Hook 'Em

Rick

ย 

  • Hook 'Em 8
Posted (edited)

Ah, yes, the 181 lbs of meat and Mercedes humblebrag thread.

Next up: the 182 lbs of potatoes and BMW humblebrag thread.

Edited by Bullneck
Posted
1 minute ago, markstanco said:


No idea whatโ€™s going on. Read about 2 paragraphs, my adhd kicked in, scrolled, and Iโ€™m here.

TL; DR flat tire disaster averted and tight ends dinner was hilarious.ย 

Posted
3 minutes ago, Hank_Hill said:

Neat. Endries didnโ€™t get the Burnt Ends schpiel until today?ย 

Yep, first time meeting or interacting with him. He thought it was super cool and fun.ย 

I can't reiterate how interested they are in throwing a party during bye week to watch the games.ย 

  • Hook 'Em 1
Posted
1 hour ago, bschoolprof said:

Well I thought it was a very lovely story.ย 

ย 

Hell yeah great stuff -- include this in the rap ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

IMG_20250915_211221.jpg.b2a64ef95b901a64c47a5d8357568472.jpg

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