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Want To Be Happier and More Successful? Learn To Like Other People

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It sounds paradoxical, but according to University of Georgia researcher Jason Colquitt and his colleagues, people who tend to trust others at work score higher on a range of measure than those who don’t, from job performance to commitment to the team. And since we know that it’s our relationships—particularly with our bosses and colleagues—that determine how happy and successful we are as our careers progress, it may be worth asking some new questions. Instead of, “How can I improve?” the better question might be, “How can I start seeing more of the good in people, more often?”

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/want-to-be-happier-and-more-successful-learn-to-like-other-people?utm_source=pocket-newtab

 

guess i'll just have to be satisfied with miserable and poor

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Learn to like and Kiss your bosses ass to get ahead at work?  Wow, novel concept.  I didn't get to Associate Vice President of my bank by playing by society's rules.  

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Posted (edited)

Nope, I'm sticking with...

 

Edited by Cajun

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1 hour ago, Lobo said:

Learn to like and Kiss your bosses ass to get ahead at work?  Wow, novel concept.  I didn't get to Associate Vice President of my bank by playing by society's rules.  

My son became a VP of Farm Credit Bank of Texas by being very good at his job.... and by organizing the golf tournaments for the bankers’ seminars.

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2 hours ago, Lobo said:

Learn to like and Kiss your bosses ass to get ahead at work?  Wow, novel concept.  I didn't get to Associate Vice President of my bank by playing by society's rules.  

Associate to the Vice President.

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Want To Be Happier and More Successful? Learn To Like Other People

 

This really, really needs to be posted in CR.

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7 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

Associate to the Vice President.

Dammit people, you will respect my authority!  Associate Vice President!  I will be in charge of half the lobby!  

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3 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

 

Want To Be Happier and More Successful? Learn To Like Other People

 

This really, really needs to be posted in CR.

It would only spark an argument.

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2 hours ago, Lobo said:

Learn to like and Kiss your bosses ass to get ahead at work?  Wow, novel concept.  I didn't get to Associate Vice President of my bank by playing by society's rules.  

Associate to the Vice President.

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I took the first available upgrade to captain. During captain charm school they went around the room and asked why we took the bid. To a man everyone said they were tired of flying with the dickheads. Now I'm the asshole and I like it. I always fly with my favorite captain. In summary: fuck you.

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Dammit people, you will respect my authority!  Associate Vice President!  I will be in charge of half the lobby!  
That's a long way to brag that you're 26.

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Actually, 43.  Getting old.  but having a team of 8-9  people underneath me at the bank will be a huge step up.  

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The people that go around professing "the secret" annoy the fuck out of me so this hits somewhat close to home for me. 

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Actually, 43.  Getting old.  but having a team of 8-9  people underneath me at the bank will be a huge step up.  



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jokes aside it's not bad advice.  if you can figure out how to like people you can get along with most people, and if you can get along with most people there are things you can do where that is valuable. And people often like having you around and want to see you succeed. 

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21 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

jokes aside it's not bad advice.  if you can figure out how to like people you can get along with most people, and if you can get along with most people there are things you can do where that is valuable. And people often like having you around and want to see you succeed. 

So long as them pawns don’t succeed more than me.

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Posted (edited)

meh.  had a dude who was my boss' right hand man.  i told him face to face if I could bury him in a dumpster and not get prosecuted, i would.  Nicest guy I ever wanted to beat the fuck out of.  Absolutely facile and professional.  jason garrett type of mannerisms, but his ineptitude made you want to absolutely crush the motherfucker.

I will never forget the extension cords we got for Christmas.  Yes, a gotdam extension cord.  WTF?

He was that way with everything.  He never had a fucking clue why his pom-pom routine didn't motivate everyone...

Edited by Iceman

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54 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Actually, 43.  Getting old.  but having a team of 8-9  people underneath me at the bank will be a huge step up.  

 

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^

pos rep.  Hits too close to home though.  I should have made Division Manager by now.  

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Posted (edited)
20 minutes ago, Iceman said:

meh.  had a dude who was my boss' right hand man.  i told him face to face if I could bury him in a dumpster and not get prosecuted, i would.  Nicest guy I ever wanted to beat the fuck out of.  Absolutely facile and professional.  jason garrett type of mannerisms, but his ineptitude made you want to absolutely crush the motherfucker.

I will never forget the extension cords we got for Christmas.  Yes, a gotdam extension cord.  WTF?

He was that way with everything.  He never had a fucking clue why his pom-pom routine didn't motivate everyone...

The trick to liking someone is a) understanding a bit about that person and b) giving a shit.  If you get someone extension cords for Christmas and it's not because there's some specific "thing" behind that as a gift, you might just be agreeable (or stupid, or not actually like that person).  Or at least, I suspect that "learn to like people" as a "key" to success is different than that.  Of course most moderately intelligent people can recognize bullshit, so it's a good office trick to remember everyone's name and at least one of their "things" (Matt loves Townes Van Zandt and has an old deaf white boxer) but it's not worth much if you're not actually interested.

Edited by Celery Man

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Posted (edited)
4 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

The trick to liking someone is a) understanding a bit about that person and b) giving a shit.  If you get someone extension cords for Christmas and it's not because there's some specific "thing" behind that as a gift, you might just be agreeable (or stupid, or not actually like that person).  Or at least, I suspect that "learn to like people" as a "key" to success is different than that.  Of course most moderately intelligent people can recognize bullshit, so it's a good office trick to remember everyone's name and at least one of their "things" (Matt loves Townes Van Zandt and has an old deaf white boxer) but it's not worth much if you're not actually interested.

yeah, dude was lacking B) in the the most severe way.

 

There was zero utility or usefulness of the extension cords.  It was an idiotic gift.  IF someone needs an extension cord at the house, they already fucking have one.

Edited by Iceman

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Posted (edited)

 

  • Roughly 3,300 home fires originate in extension cords each year, killing 50 people and injuring about 270 more.

https://www.esfi.org/resource/extension-cord-safety-336

 

Was it a UL (not the same as UIL, bro) certified extension cord?  Guy was trying to save the lives of you and your loved ones, you ignorant ungrateful hothead. 

hqdefault.jpg

I like you, but you bring great shame to Mike Leach.

 

Edited by clapclapclap

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Meh, Leach would have told him to go fuck himself.

 

I was hardly the only person who disliked the guy, and certainly not the only one disappointed in the thoughtless gift.

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If by liking people, it means sexing all the secretaries worth sexing then I should be head of the mailroom by now.

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Older dudes like myself have learned a lot over the years about careers, a working life, and ourselves. It’s knowledge that would be very useful to younger people in their careers. I’ve often kicked around the concept of turning all of that knowledge into an online career management portal for people to really get their shit together and head towards a happier more fulfilling life. All of the career resources I’ve run into over the years are crap.

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I don’t give enough of a shit about my “career” to make myself like other people.

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It's relatively easy to make your colleagues think you like them when you don't.  You don't have to lie to yourself about it.

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On the subway today, a man came up to me to start a conversation. He made small talk, a lonely man talking about the weather and other things. I tried to be pleasant and accommodating, but my head hurt from his banality. I almost didn't notice it had happened, but I suddenly threw up all over him. 

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My biggest weakness is that I cant hide my contempt for people who annoy the shit out of me. I tell them straight up to leave me alone, and that I don't care about what they have to say about anything. One guy at work took that as a challenge, and would pester me every god damn day trying to strike conversation about some stupid shit. I went to the boss and said it's me or him, and two weeks later that jabbering idiot was gone.  

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I have taken great care at my office to be friendly and personable with everyone while never soliciting or giving personal information. I'm sure it hinders me, but I don't want to be friends with people I work with. What the fuck are you people even doing exchanging gifts with coworkers or even caring enough to be offended by what they gave you? 

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Posted (edited)
18 hours ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

Associate to the Vice President.

most likely Assistant to the Traveling Secretary....

Unknown-1.jpg 

Edited by BillyGoatHill

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Bears repeating, "I'll never understand people's fascination with people."  

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I'm curious just exactly what kind of extension cords we are talking about here. Are we talking about one of those flimsy indoor ones you plug christmas lights into, or a heavy 12 gauge 150 foot outdoor extension cord? Because the later would be a pretty sweet gift.

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