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A story about a pathetic man's downfall


Francisco 2.0

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1 hour ago, TexasHooch said:

The fuck you talking about Dinesh?

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Oh, got it.  So the "major announcement" that he told us he'd deliver at 11:00 today, wasn't actually the video he posted today at 11:00 under the header "major announcement."  Instead, the true announcement was the sneaky launch of his BBFSOREISP initiative.  I have to admit, it has a nice ring to it.

Dinesh is Gary IRL

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23 minutes ago, Fastbreak said:

How long until the:

“Someone did this without my permission and has been FIRED!”

post?

 

15 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Gotta wait and see how sales go first. 

No, my friends. He doesn't wait for reality; he creates it.

Noone has ever seen sales on trading cards like this. Ever. Bigger than Babe Ruth or Mickey Mantle. Huge. People tell me that they're the hightest quality they've ever seen. Beautiful. Thing is, we're running out of them. People are frantically trying to get them before they're gone. Winning. How many cards has sleepy Joe sold?

The radical socialist Democrat party hates it. Crazy Nancy, nasty woman, is crying her eye make-up all over her saggy...dress. There's a pussy no one wants to grab. She's disgusting. 

Next week we're running out the Trump Vegamatic with a picture of me, your favorite president, right there on gorgeous case for it. 

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10 minutes ago, Horn Under a Bad Sign said:

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When you've lost Baked Alaska...

I don't know why this event would be the one to undo Trump, but this is starting to feel a bit like the Dean Scream.  Maybe its the combination of public self-humiliation coinciding with the rise of an alternative (DeSantis) who looks like they can run further with Trump's baton.

Dean-Scream.jpg

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My three takeaways from this article:  the NFT's are hosted on the website itself, instead of in a blockchain, so when the website is shutdown someday, the NFT's will disappear forever;  as of the writing, $1.1 million worth of these fucking things have already been sold, and the funds from these trading cards do not go towards any re-election campaign.  In other words, Trump has made around a million today from hopeless fucking idiots who had to have a damned jpg of him.

 

https://defector.com/major-announcement-from-donald-trump-turns-out-to-be-nfts-of-his-head-photoshopped-onto-a-skinny-man-in-a-tuxedo/

 

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Donald Trump is running for president, as he probably will be in some way or other for the rest of his natural life, and that naturally complicates things for him. He is still Donald Trump, and as such mostly spends his time doing the things that Donald Trump does: driving a golf cart around, trying to get people to give him money for stuff he’s definitely not going to do, gossiping about other rich people. But because Trump is also the former President of the United States, and because he is currently and will always be trying to restore himself to that office—and especially because millions of Americans see him not as the mincing and highly distractible cable-news casualty who got thumped in an election by Joe Biden’s muttering ghost but as a divinely ordained figure who has been waiting for just the right moment to purify the land by overseeing a paroxysm of retributive violence highlighted by show trials and mass executions of his political enemies—this can create some confusion when Trump does the things that come most naturally to him.

 

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So when Trump announced on the little Playskool Twitter where he does his posts now that Thursday would see a MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT, it could have gone either way. There was speculation among the ReTruthing community that Trump was announcing a game-changing running mate for his presidential campaign, or that perhaps The Storm Was Upon Us at last and military tribunals were underway and Nasty Nancy was being rendered to Gitmo post-haste for her crimes against patriotism. It was either that or Trump announcing that he would be selling $99 jpegs.

 

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“These cards feature some of the really incredible artwork pertaining to my life and career, it’s been very exciting,” Trump says over some furious string adagios in the video announcement. In place of the lumpy and glowering Trump that has become familiar from his news interviews, there is the version of Trump that used to shout that steak “is my favorite food” on behalf of The Sharper Image. This Trump is pink as a marshmallow Peep and swaying in a way that suggests he might be wearing rollerblades, and he rolls through his promotional copy with the panache and confidence that can only come with reading something in very large type for the first time as it scrolls along a teleprompter. 

 

Spoiler

While Trump does this, some really incredible artwork appears next to him. We see various images pertaining to his life and career—Trump playing golf, Trump sitting at a dinner table, Trump in an astronaut costume, Trump riding a big elephant, Trump firing lasers out of his eyes. The people who purchase these NFT’s will not only be purchasing high-quality art—based on the quality of the images, Trump may well have made them himself—but become part of a very exclusive community. “It’s my community,” Trump says in the video announcement, “and it’s something I think you’re going to like, and you’re going to like it a lot.”

In addition to the opportunity to join the NFT scene at a moment when it is notably less crowded than it used to be, buyers will chance to win some classically Trumpian sweepstake prizes—the opportunity to get on a private Zoom call with the former president, or a much less-private Zoom call, or to play exactly one hour of golf with him at one of his golf courses, or to attend a dinner at which Trump himself will also be present. These prizes are presented with admirable detail at collecttrumpcards.com, which is how those considering a purchase can learn that the gala dinner event is Black Tie (Optional) and will feature “music playing throughout the evening,” or that while Trump himself will not join you for dinner for two at Trump Tower, “his office will call ahead to make sure they know you are family!” Other prizes are presented in more qualified ways. “Some” but not all copies of Trump’s coffee table book given as prizes will bear his autograph. Also, concerning the Mystery Prize: please calm down about the Mystery Prize. “What is it?” the copy teases. “Even though we can’t reveal what the prizes are, we can tell you you’ll be very happy to receive this Mystery Prize if you’re a President Donald J. Trump fan!”

As is generally the case where Donald Trump is concerned, the people that win these prizes should probably not actually expect to actually receive them. As is generally notthe case where NFTs are concerned, these images are hosted not on the blockchain but on the website collecttrumpcards.com, and so will disappear when the site does. As is always the case with Trump, the towering and brazen jankiness of the broader enterprise has not dissuaded any of his fans from backing it to the max, even though the money does not actually go to his campaign fund (“NO,” states the fine print, which uses perhaps more all-caps than does most legal boilerplate and makes clear that Trump merely licensed his likeness rights); more than $1.1 million worth have been sold already. If they had their choice, of course, they’d choose the summary execution of thousands of people, neighbors and strangers and people from TV that they’ve come to see as demonic predators dead set on the destruction of all they hold dear. But failing that, a picture of Trump’s face crudely photoshopped onto various healthy male bodies will do.

 

 

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36 minutes ago, Goredho said:

When you've lost Baked Alaska...

I don't know why this event would be the one to undo Trump, but this is starting to feel a bit like the Dean Scream.  Maybe its the combination of public self-humiliation coinciding with the rise of an alternative (DeSantis) who looks like they can run further with Trump's baton.

Dean-Scream.jpg

Being eliminated for a moment of innocent enthusiasm was a huge revelation for just how terrible our political coverage is and how ovine our electorate.

I hadn't decided on Dean, so I'm not like a Bernie Bro. This guy is better than any GOP president of the 21st Century. 

But he yelled! It was silly and exuberant. Stone him to death.

Idiot World. It's not just for GOPs.

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Surprise.  The "clothes" Trump is wearing are pictures lifted from clothing websites:

 

https://gizmodo.com/donald-trump-nft-trading-cards-1849900531

 

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Over the last 24 hours, fans of ex-President Donald Trump have sat huddled in their chairs, waiting with bated breath for a supposed announcement the once tweeter-in-chief promised would blow their socks off. He posted a videoto his Truth Social page showing an image of him in a kind of superhero garb, sporting pecs he most certainly does not have, as laser beams shoot from his eyes. What could this mean? What apocalypse was coming? 

 

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On Thursday the grand surprise was finally revealed and it was nothing but another horrific NFT project that, in Trump’s words, featured “amazing ART of my Life & Career!” These “digital trading cards” are indeed just another cash grab NFT project, but the low quality images and the company in charge of the project are a more complicated enigma. 

 

 

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Each NFT sells for a total $99, and some are limited as single copies, while other NFTs are available in two, five, seven, or 10 copies. There are a total of 45,000 cards in the initial release, but even more, one big fan of Mr. Trump will be “guaranteed” a ticket to some future gala dinner with him, ostensibly at his Mar a Lago residence in South Florida. The auction even promised to pay for transportation. So yes, spend $4,455 and you too can have a sit down with the former president himself. Although we can guarantee you he will not look nearly as slim as he does in these trading cards. 

 

Spoiler

The images were so lazy that based on reverse image searches they were edited photos scraped off the internet. It’s unclear if they were edited by hand or perhaps crafted using AI image generation, though the one image of Trump in hunter garb bears a very distinct resemblance to waders crafted by Banded, a hunting apparel company. 

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Trump’s cowboy outfit appears to match a leather duster made by Scully Sportswear, a California-based costume and western garb shop.

 

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Gizmodo reached out to both companies to see if they had had any agreement with the NFT project to seemingly use their products, but we did not immediately hear back.

The whole thing is bizarre in so many different ways. In a video featuring Trump promoting the project, Trump claims he’s “better than [Abraham] Lincoln, better than [George] Washington.” He then says “each card comes with an automatic chance to win amazing prizes like dinner with me. I don’t know if that’s an amazing prize but it’s what we have.”

And while your first assumption would be that all this money would go toward supporting Trump’s reelection campaign, you would be wrong, at least according to the company’s page. NFT INT LLC, the company listed as hosting the NFT auction, wrote: 

“These Digital Trading Cards are not political and have nothing to do with any political campaign. NFT INT LLC is not owned, managed or controlled by Donald J. Trump, The Trump Organization, CIC Digital LLC or any of their respective principals or affiliates. NFT INT LLC uses Donald J. Trump’s name, likeness and image under paid license from CIC Digital LLC, which license may be terminated or revoked according to its terms.

Gizmodo reached out to NFT INT to get some better understanding of how this all came together, but we did not immediately hear back.

Things get even stranger when looking at the company that’s running the auction. The company, NFT INT LLC, lists its address to a kitschy strip mall in Utah that contains a few shops and restaurants, a dry cleaners, as well as a UPS store. As Gizmodo has previously reported, companies affiliated with attempts to buy Trump’s favored social media platform Truth Social have had similar arrangements by being based out of a UPS Store mailbox. 

It’s even more unclear who is operating behind the scenes. Gizmodo found two companies called NFT INT registered in California and in Delaware, which, of course, neither are located in Utah.

We have reached out to the individual listed as the CEO in charge of the California-registered LLC, and we will update the story if we learn more.

So if you’re really into the idea of a Trump NFT, for some reason, just be aware the NFTs are “non-refundable” and “non-returnable.” Of course, you can just do what we did and right click and “save-as,” but that would defeat the purpose of digital scarcity, now wouldn’t it?

 

 

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8 hours ago, mdmost said:

I can only picture his braindead supporters all sitting on pins and needles waiting for this announcement, hoping it's something to do with making him President again. And all they get is more grift. You love to see it. 

4 hours ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

Just a hunch here, but I suspect this entire thing was dreamed up by Eric.  

I mean, of the three kids, that's the one who most like would have conjured up (or was conned by someone) this piece of shit scam.  Right?

"Dad, Dad!  This guy on the phone has an incredible idea for you to make some money!  It's digital!"

His supporters were all thinking he was going to own the libs somehow, and it's this instead.

I don't know who dreamed it up, but I'm sure somebody told him "and we get to sell these things digitally, so that there are no warehouses, no stock we have to keep on hand, and we can make as many as we want".

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