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Official 2022 Bitch about Family - Holiday Insanity


tx 3 putt

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14 minutes ago, Longboard Horn said:

Day at my stepbrothers started off rocky, but actually went smoothly after a few shots of Crown and Capt. Morgan and cokes. 3 year old nephew was acting like he was afraid of the dogs(Catahoula and Pitbull) even though they're chill, down to earth and are good with children. LOL my BIL tells the nephew, "dogs are man's best friend, stop being a soy boy!" When asked what that means, he explained that a soy boy is a nicer way of calling someone a sissy or pussy. Mom and oldest sister did all the cooking and we all hung out and watched the Packers. Of course, as soon as I arrived early like I planned my stepbrother was in the back room because like every year he hadn't finished wrapping his gifts for the family.... 

Spent the evening at an uncle's house. Badass brisket, chicken wings, sweet potatoes, collard greens, and ribs! Best part of the whole day is that I didn't have to see my brother's idiot bitch half sister. 

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

One of these years I'm just gonna have shot glasses and all of my booze out on the table to kick shit off.

Seems like the element we've been missing...

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I'll see if I can get the brisket recipe, but I'm telling you, a properly prepared Jewish brisket is like witchcraft. All you taste is the meat and subtle spices, served with sour creme and apple sauce garnished latkes and bacon-wrapped almond-stuffed dates. Our mixed non-kosher family dinners are the highlight of my year.

Well, that and the Greenberg smoked turkey and Rabideaux sausage gumbo.

Headed to the range today for more training with my daughter. Ain't it cute?

f8846c146eaeb53ad563148905f08b36.jpg

Also they closed the Waffle House on the freeway at College and my SIL salvaged the letters from the sign from the demo company. She’s selling them for $150 each. (paging Mrs. Cumstein). This piece of pop art looks great in the sunroom/bar room, dontcha think? (first letter of their last name)

9c17959e14cd26a4f9f534c3d8ce40d2.jpg

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Sitting in my chair watching my family prepare our traditional New Mexican Christmas dinner. Carne adovada, green chilé chicken enchiladas, tamales, frijoles, guacamole, taquitos, calabacitas, papas, tortillas.
Oldest is married, SIL studying paramedic stuff (he’s former SF, current firefighter/paramedic). Middle daughter gets married this March, great guy. Son gets married in May, great young woman. 
Nice, easy conversation. Calm, no drama, sorry to bring down the spirit of the thread. I’m just overwhelmingly blessed as I sit here. Hope I get a grandkid or two in the next year. 
 
FA30DBED-8422-4D09-92E0-6D0D64306FFD.thumb.jpeg.7d8c1393ad1a6c54174decda98f972cb.jpeg

Ditto. My sons’s new job comes with a deployment to Kuwait and they are going to start trying upon his return.
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2 hours ago, BearSchlong said:

I'll see if I can get the brisket recipe, but I'm telling you, a properly prepared Jewish brisket is like witchcraft. All you taste is the meat and subtle spices, served with sour creme and apple sauce garnished latkes and bacon-wrapped almond-stuffed dates. Our mixed non-kosher family dinners are the highlight of my year.

Well, that and the Greenberg smoked turkey and Rabideaux sausage gumbo.

Headed to the range today for more training with my daughter. Ain't it cute?

f8846c146eaeb53ad563148905f08b36.jpg

Also they closed the Waffle House on the freeway at College and my SIL salvaged the letters from the sign from the demo company. She’s selling them for $150 each. (paging Mrs. Cumstein). This piece of pop art looks great in the sunroom/bar room, dontcha think? (first letter of their last name)

9c17959e14cd26a4f9f534c3d8ce40d2.jpg

 

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37 minutes ago, nnm said:

 

That's fucking hilarious.  Reminds me of the Nate Bargatze story about he and Louis J. Gomez at McDonald's.  Give it a listen, only about 3 minutes long.  

And I don't know why but I love the Peter & Giant Chicken reference to Family Guy, 'cause eggs.  

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21 hours ago, pearlandhorn said:

 

I’ll find out tomorrow what the resulting conversation was with my other SIL regarding the deadbeat BIL as she was pretty tipsy when I left (I stayed with my folks tonight).

Got the scoop from my wife this morning. Apparently two years of no running water and no heater has made my SIL finally start looking for a place on her own. She has literally been supporting him for 15+ years by herself. Very proud of her. Before I left my in laws house yesterday, I gave her a hug and told her that if she needed anything to give us a call.

Bitchy SIL is still at my in laws house with the yippy dog. Her boyfriend left to go visit his 90 year old mom in Dallas and she wasn’t invited. I didn’t spend any time over there today so no drama on my end today. I think we’re done with the holiday drama now as we leave tomorrow.

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My SIL is a fantastic entrepreneur. She was having custom menorahs made and stumbled across a unique design. First they were being machined from wood, then my Stepbro sent some schematics for some lucite candlestick holders (very modern, non-menorah) to a few factories in China and one day he woke up to 100 emails from factories practically begging to make them for pennies. Some deals were cut, she put up a website and it went viral on Instagram and she sold 20K of them @ $100 - $250 ea.

She just happened to be driving by Waffle House when a sign crew was taking the letters down. She called their boss, they were going to throw them away as soon as the demo invoice was paid. He sold her the lot for like $50. Add some LED lighting and boom- iconic pop art.

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2 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

I’ve never eaten at Waffle House in my life,  I don’t think I’ve ever actually seen one in real life.

consider yourself lucky.  If my kid hadn't served in garden spots like Benning and Polk, there's a good chance that we'd be in the same boat.

 

It's really cheap, really shitty Denny's food. 

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5 hours ago, cactusflinthead said:

Sometimes there is entertainment.

 

 

in general, you want no part of a waffle house waitress. she's lived a life you can not imagine.........but the waitress in this fight, could kill 99% of the board with her bare hands, probably all at once !

 

 

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8 hours ago, tx ind said:

ha- was waiting for someone to post the Bourdain video

 

just rewatched it, couple of thoughts ....

1. bourdain was a damn national treasure man. boys, don't ever let pussy sink you 

2. if anyone here ever talks shit about waffle house in my presence, we're fucking fighting !

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6 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Somebody wanna tell him it's crooked?  

Just my petty jealousy talking ;)  

Or better, let's tell him it is hung level, but the fireplace bricks were placed crooked.  Will never NOT see that when looking at it in the future.

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Christmas Eve wasn't as bad as I thought. Took some of y'all's advice and got all the pre-prepped food from HEB. All I had to pick up was a couple bags of ice and swung by the local La Michoacana for fajita meat. GFs brother and father kept their word and helped me grill and the party was just her immediate family and mine so nice and small. For being a good sport, her family surprised me with tickets to the Mavs game so I got to see the Dirk statue and Luka get that 60 20 10 in person which was pretty epic. 

Now having some left over BBQ and getting ready for the Alamo Bowl. HOOK EM!

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On 12/27/2022 at 9:29 PM, tx 3 putt said:

 

in general, you want no part of a waffle house waitress. she's lived a life you can not imagine.........but the waitress in this fight, could kill 99% of the board with her bare hands, probably all at once !

 

 

 

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On 12/27/2022 at 9:43 PM, Ignatius said:

Awful House fucking sucks and all the crackers here in ATL love that shit…

I’m not saying it’s some great dining experience, but a waffle, eggs, and some scattered hash browns hit the spot on the rare occasion I venture inside one.

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Soooo glad this seasons done.


Not sure how to post this without whining too much since I’ve whined about my BIL before.


Made Christmas Day and NYE supper for BILs family and ours. Easy meals but still had to shop, prep, cook, serve, clean. Something BIL and his wife don’t offer to help in anything. Infuriating.

And their daughter fucking cries and tattles about anything whether it’s getting hit in the head with a Velcro plastic tiny ball to my daughter sitting at the island in the middle seat but SHE had to sit in the middle seat so instant crying. Neither parent hardly parents her to shut up about tattling but it’s me and my wife trying to get our daughter to basically stop trolling her.

And their 12 yr old son is the biggest mooch next to his dad. He opened up some electronic bank he got and asked if I had batteries for him. Lied to him and said I don’t. Then raids my pantry for personal snacks like his dad would. Then opens up my daughters gifts which was those tiny toys that comes with 250 pieces some of which are now missing. He wanted to open a freaking wack a mole game for my 4 year old which I knew he’d pound the shit out of with the toy rubber hammer so I had to tell him no twice on 2 different occasions.

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On 12/31/2022 at 5:48 AM, Brew said:

I’m not saying it’s some great dining experience, but a waffle, eggs, and some scattered hash browns hit the spot on the rare occasion I venture inside one.

Do they do a good waffle at least?  There’s a fine line between too soft and too crispy.

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4 hours ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Soooo glad this seasons done.


Not sure how to post this without whining too much since I’ve whined about my BIL before.


Made Christmas Day and NYE supper for BILs family and ours. Easy meals but still had to shop, prep, cook, serve, clean. Something BIL and his wife don’t offer to help in anything. Infuriating.

And their daughter fucking cries and tattles about anything whether it’s getting hit in the head with a Velcro plastic tiny ball to my daughter sitting at the island in the middle seat but SHE had to sit in the middle seat so instant crying. Neither parent hardly parents her to shut up about tattling but it’s me and my wife trying to get our daughter to basically stop trolling her.

And their 12 yr old son is the biggest mooch next to his dad. He opened up some electronic bank he got and asked if I had batteries for him. Lied to him and said I don’t. Then raids my pantry for personal snacks like his dad would. Then opens up my daughters gifts which was those tiny toys that comes with 250 pieces some of which are now missing. He wanted to open a freaking wack a mole game for my 4 year old which I knew he’d pound the shit out of with the toy rubber hammer so I had to tell him no twice on 2 different occasions.

For the nephew, go get the belt. 

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13 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

Do they do a good waffle at least?  There’s a fine line between too soft and too crispy.

It serves the purpose, it’s not very thick and they will cook it a little extra for you if you want it a little more crunchy.

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My parents came to visit (flew in) and up-front: they are lovely people who are nice to their family members and don’t belong in any sort of thread of dysfunction. That said, each time they come I begin to notice the senior citizen stubbornness, set in their ways stuff.  With my mom, it manifests itself with food, she is not at all willing to try new things and I spend a lot of time trying to do special orders and find out ingredient lists in every single damn thing. No biggie at home, but we live in Europe and wait staff here doesn’t have time for shit like that. I badly want to treat her like my kids and just say “try it and if you don’t like it leave it on the plate or scrape it off, this isn’t Burger King.”

The peak this time was when they flew out. They had done online check in and when I got to the airport it was a shit show even two hours in advance.  There was a MASSIVE queue— two charter buses- of Vietnamese going home for Lunar New Year and each group was pushing a cart with extra bags and coolers full of food and shit. This damn line stretched way past the snake line halfway axles the departure terminal and there were grim expressions on the faces of every single passenger not a member of this group.
 

No worries, we’ve got online check-in and we can go to the shorter bag drop. Mom announces “we don’t have boarding passes, the system said we needed to go to the counter.” Shit. The harried airline rep ain’t budging— no boarding passes, we go to join the growing line.
 

We stood in this damn line for well over an hour when mom’s phone dings. It’s a text from the airline with flight status. And as she’s checking it, she notices she has a bunch of unread texts from the airline. ALL OF THEIR GOTDAMN BOARDING PASSES. 
 

Explanation- she thought she asked to get them by email so when they didn’t come, she assumed she needed to go to the counter. The alleged instructions saying she couldn’t get them and to go to the counter were fictitious, “I just figured that’s what it meant when I didn’t get an email.” 

 

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12 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

My parents came to visit (flew in) and up-front: they are lovely people who are nice to their family members and don’t belong in any sort of thread of dysfunction. That said, each time they come I begin to notice the senior citizen stubbornness, set in their ways stuff.  With my mom, it manifests itself with food, she is not at all willing to try new things and I spend a lot of time trying to do special orders and find out ingredient lists in every single damn thing. No biggie at home, but we live in Europe and wait staff here doesn’t have time for shit like that. I badly want to treat her like my kids and just say “try it and if you don’t like it leave it on the plate or scrape it off, this isn’t Burger King.”

The peak this time was when they flew out. They had done online check in and when I got to the airport it was a shit show even two hours in advance.  There was a MASSIVE queue— two charter buses- of Vietnamese going home for Lunar New Year and each group was pushing a cart with extra bags and coolers full of food and shit. This damn line stretched way past the snake line halfway axles the departure terminal and there were grim expressions on the faces of every single passenger not a member of this group.
 

No worries, we’ve got online check-in and we can go to the shorter bag drop. Mom announces “we don’t have boarding passes, the system said we needed to go to the counter.” Shit. The harried airline rep ain’t budging— no boarding passes, we go to join the growing line.
 

We stood in this damn line for well over an hour when mom’s phone dings. It’s a text from the airline with flight status. And as she’s checking it, she notices she has a bunch of unread texts from the airline. ALL OF THEIR GOTDAMN BOARDING PASSES. 
 

Explanation- she thought she asked to get them by email so when they didn’t come, she assumed she needed to go to the counter. The alleged instructions saying she couldn’t get them and to go to the counter were fictitious, “I just figured that’s what it meant when I didn’t get an email.” 

 

Don't let your mother be in charge of plane tickets anymore. LOL old folks..... they don't understand Apple wallet and electronic tickets in my experience. 

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On 12/24/2022 at 8:39 AM, Kennythetiger said:

My siblings and I were in our 30s when we voted no more Christmas presents for adults- buy shit for the little kids if you want. My mom took it really hard, and then this year made the comment, “I sure am glad I decided that gifts for adults should stop. Sure makes things a lot easier.”  
We just nodded our heads and agreed with her. 

First year with this agreement with my parents too. It was awesome. No issues with family drama during the holidays but trying to figure out meaningful gifts for adults that can afford shit they really want was always a massive headache. So glad we stopped. Now it’s just about booze and old stories. 

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47 minutes ago, Vertuzzi said:

First year with this agreement with my parents too. It was awesome. No issues with family drama during the holidays but trying to figure out meaningful gifts for adults that can afford shit they really want was always a massive headache. So glad we stopped. Now it’s just about booze and old stories. 

This is us too. All the adults in our family can easily afford anything they want or need so it became a pretty pointless exercise.

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1 hour ago, HamsterHookah said:

This is us too. All the adults in our family can easily afford anything they want or need so it became a pretty pointless exercise.

Between a 16 year old and a 2 year old, there's plenty of gifting going around in our family, so the adults don't need anything. 

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