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lilMAC25
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  • lilMAC25 changed the title to F cancer.
1 hour ago, lilMAC25 said:

I don’t know where to put this, so it’s going here.

 

My Dad, Mike B, was just diagnosed today with Kidney cancer. He’s 73, and he’s survived all sorts other stuff, so I’m hopeful he can survive this. He’s a tremendous father and a example of a man which I can only barely hope to emulate. My poor mother is devastated.

 

I’ll take any prayers or positive thoughts you’re willing to send his way.

 

thanks for taking the time to read this

Praying for your dad, bud.

Spend this period of time (even if he takes treatment well) with him as much as possible, soaking up as much of him as you can, and telling how much you love and appreciate him.

Been down this road. It’s tough, but there is a lot of sweetness if you’re looking for it. Never let something you want to say to him go unsaid. Let there be no doubt of your love for him.
 

Be strong. He’ll need it, but people are amazingly resilient and medicine can do great things. 

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Prayers to your old man.

In 2020, right in the middle of the shitshow of the pandemic, my dad got bladder cancer. It took a couple surgeries and several months of chemo, but he beat it and is in remission. 

From that experience, I’ll tell you that chemo can take a lot out of a guy in his 70s. Be prepared for the chemo fog. I think my dad was probably already heading into some of the absent mindedness/early dementia of old age, but when he was in chemo he was really scatterbrained, and I could tell it was visibly frustrating to him. He got back to normal a few months after the chemo stopped.

Best to you and your mom.

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Take Mike B to MD Anderson in Houston. The fine docs there create excellent treatment plans for specific issues and specific patients. Two close relatives of mine went in scared and pessimistic and came out cancer free. It wasn’t fun and it wasn’t quick but they were fucking cancer free. 

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We have come such a long way in a very short amount of time when it comes to treatment. Best thing all of your family can do is stay positive have the mindset that it’s time to fuck cancer up. 
 

I will keep y’all in my thoughts and prayers.

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My mom passed away last year from ovarian cancer at 63. It's a disease that affects all of us at some point. Some are easier to cure than others though. Regardless, spend time with your dad and give him a hug whenever you can.

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All my love, and all my prayers to you and your family.
My daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer roughly a month ago, and unfortunately my wife and family withhold a lot of things from me due to my health.  I know she had some malignant tumors removed from her breast, and some lymph nodes. Treatment was originally supposed to be radiation, but now is full blown chemo.  She had a port put in her neck this past Tuesday and is supposed to start treatments in 2 weeks.  I do not have a good feeling about this at all.

Shooter, prayers for you, your family, and daughter. I can’t imagine your pain seeing your daughter go thru this struggle. Hold her close and help her how you can, part of which is just being her dad encouraging and comforting her as she goes thru the scariness and sickness of chemo. God bless you.
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My mom died of cancer in '74. Her sister, my aunt, survived the exact same cancer in '76 and beat other forms of cancer for the next 35 years. Treatment has come a long way and keeps getting better everyday. Praying for your dad and your mom (and you) too. 

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IliMac right now you are still dealing with the bludgeon of the word Cancer. My prayers for your dad, your mom and the whole family. You didn’t give many details so I’ll speak in general terms.

It’s time to get to work. You have to do what you can to help him but also your mother. She will be his primary emotional person, if they have a good marriage. She is likely worried about being widowed young so help her as much as you help your dad. You and the siblings should be the physical and treatment foundation for them both. Go to the oncologist meetings. Know everything you can; it’s time for a crash fluency in all things renal cancer.

There isn’t a single treatment strategy for various cancers, but in various areas there can be a singular philosophy. Know where doctors go to school. Know what those philosophies are because in some places if all the docs went to the same med school all will have the same treatment philosophy. Some are more focused on slow reactions and wait and sees which might work with some cancers but in my life it seems that playing defense is usually wrong. You need aggressive strategies as there are only three treatments: cut it out, poison it, burn it. The usual reaction to these doctors is blind trust; know what your dads cancer is and the different strategies and treatments are out there. Know which hospitals are best for that specific cancer; might be MD Anderson, or Mayo, or Duke, or John’s Hopkins or wherever.

The good news is that most renal cancers are more encapsulated and slow to metatisize. Hopefully that is what your old man has.

A few things that can help, from my friend the oncologist. Get him off sugar and simple carbs; they fuel inflammation. If he can tolerate keto/ paleo move him there. Get off processed foods and into fresh fruits and veg. Anxiety is bad. Find ways to help him whether that’s prayer, meditation, yoga, golf, fishing, sex, alprazolam, or hanging with the family or grandkids. Respect his wishes in how he wants to talk about it. Some folks want to clam up, others want to tell everything about their health thru every med or procedure. Don’t quit fighting. Love and laughter are great medicines.

God bless you all.

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Agreed, fuck cancer.

My wife is a year removed from treatment.  Was probably the hardest experience we've gone thru so far.

Support from family and friends is most important.  And everyone has their own feelings about cancer.  Some want to pretend it doesn't exist, some want to feel sad and some try to stay positive and even joke about it.

Hope you dad kicks cancer right in the butthole.

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Sorry to see this, @lilMAC25, and the same goes for you, @SHOOTER12.  

I know what it's like to be raised by a superstar father.  As others have said, tell him everything.  Soak up the history.  Learn his lessons.  My dad didn't have a chance -- brain tumor -- but we were able to shake off our natural stoicism and really express our love and admiration for each other.  It helped him, it helped my mom & sister, and selfishly, it helped me.

I am thinking about both your families.  Fuck cancer.

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12 hours ago, lilMAC25 said:

I don’t know where to put this, so it’s going here.

 

My Dad, Mike B, was just diagnosed today with Kidney cancer. He’s 73, and he’s survived all sorts other stuff, so I’m hopeful he can survive this. He’s a tremendous father and a example of a man which I can only barely hope to emulate. My poor mother is devastated.

 

I’ll take any prayers or positive thoughts you’re willing to send his way.

 

thanks for taking the time to read this

Thoughts and prayers, lilMac !     

Some excellent advice above.

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12 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

All my love, and all my prayers to you and your family.

My daughter was diagnosed with breast cancer roughly a month ago, and unfortunately my wife and family withhold a lot of things from me due to my health.  I know she had some malignant tumors removed from her breast, and some lymph nodes.

Praying for you and your daughter too, Shooter. I know you've been through a lot and are tough. I am sure your daughter inherited your toughness.

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8 hours ago, Bama Llama said:

Take Mike B to MD Anderson in Houston. The fine docs there create excellent treatment plans for specific issues and specific patients. Two close relatives of mine went in scared and pessimistic and came out cancer free. It wasn’t fun and it wasn’t quick but they were fucking cancer free. 

100% this. MDACC should be your first stop. Don't even think of another place (local, easier, whatever).

Sorry to hear you and your father have to go through this. Keep your spirits high and laugh hard. You got this, Dad! Hook'em.

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Vibes to your dad @lilMAC25

My sister beat breast cancer only to be diagnosed with brain cancer this past year.  Brain surgery (to remove golfball size tumor) then chemo/radiation.

 

She seems to have kicked the shit out of that too.

She also has to be the most positive, annoyingly so at times, person I've ever been around.  

 

So stay positive, have him stay positive and great things can happen.

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9 hours ago, Bama Llama said:

Take Mike B to MD Anderson in Houston. The fine docs there create excellent treatment plans for specific issues and specific patients. Two close relatives of mine went in scared and pessimistic and came out cancer free. It wasn’t fun and it wasn’t quick but they were fucking cancer free. 

Can personally attest to this. The doctors at MDA give me hope that Cancer will one day be defeated. Amazing place with amazing people doing amazing things.

Personal advice is to stay off the internet, leads to dark places with regards to cancer. The doctors will also tell you that they have made so much process in the recent 5-10 years that all the statistics, procedures and processes you will find online won't be accurate at all.  Prayers for a speedy recovery.

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18 hours ago, lilMAC25 said:

I don’t know where to put this, so it’s going here.

 

My Dad, Mike B, was just diagnosed today with Kidney cancer. He’s 73, and he’s survived all sorts other stuff, so I’m hopeful he can survive this. He’s a tremendous father and a example of a man which I can only barely hope to emulate. My poor mother is devastated.

 

I’ll take any prayers or positive thoughts you’re willing to send his way.

 

thanks for taking the time to read this

Kidney cancer sucks. I caught a case 4 years ago when they found a big MF tumor on the left kidney. Thought I had Stage 2. They snipped it out, all fine for 2 years. Then it turns out a little bit had spread before they got to it, and HEY! I got stage 4. But turns out, they got stuff for that now. I am doing well and hope your Dad does too. Shoot me a DM if he wants details.

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19 hours ago, lilMAC25 said:

I don’t know where to put this, so it’s going here.

 

My Dad, Mike B, was just diagnosed today with Kidney cancer. He’s 73, and he’s survived all sorts other stuff, so I’m hopeful he can survive this. He’s a tremendous father and a example of a man which I can only barely hope to emulate. My poor mother is devastated.

 

I’ll take any prayers or positive thoughts you’re willing to send his way.

 

thanks for taking the time to read this

My father in law suddenly passed just days after his 70th birthday party. We were close and I'm just thankful I had a chance to take him to a Horns game (last year's win vs Kstate) once before we lost him.

Good men are hard to find in this world. We all should mourn when we lose one. You and your family are in my thoughts. 

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Thank you all. Seriously, for a Bunch of Assholes, you’ve lifted my spirits. 
 

quick update 

talked to the surgical urologist today, tomorrow is  thoracic CT to see if he’s metastasized or not as his initial complaint was shortness of breath. No one noticed the fluid in his lungs in the X-ray or CT until the urologist reviewed the films today. 

 

Oncologic urologist said “3cm lesion very close to the renal vein” and some possible lymph node involvement, but they won’t know until biopsy which will happen on Monday. He wants daddy to get a 2nd opinion and referred him to an different urologist in Galveston at UTMB because they have a robot there for more delicate work. They’d prefer NOT to take the entire kidney, but the Galveston Dr said he’d only agree to do it if Mother and Daddy agree that he can use his discretion and take the entire kidney if necessary. As we were under the impression that would happen anyways, they’re fine with that. 
 

I’m praying that the lung issue is something else entirely and they can treat this kidney cancer and he can have another 10-15 years of health.

 

thank you all again.

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Mrs. OrangeAss was diagnosed in August 2021 with kidney cancer, 7.3 cm and MRI revealed it was fully encapsulated.  Had an amazing doctor who did a partial kidney removal via robotic surgery in October 2021.  Minimal incisions and very glad most of that kidney still remains intact.  There was no metastases anywhere including lymph nodes.  6 months later the MRI revealed no cancer at all. We were very lucky.  And yeah, we were told it grows slowly, but she still wanted that shit out of her ASAP.  It was caught because she had a pain in the side that turned out to be diverticulitis that had become inflamed, but the MRI for that revealed the cancer, which was stage 1.  No radiation or chemo was necessary.  She is considered to be cured.  FUCK CANCER!

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So sorry.  All I can offer is he has no choice but to buckle in and fight.  It’s a bitch, but just tell him to focus on “what’s the next thing I gotta do?” And one day he’ll be through to the other side healthy and happy.

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My prayers to your family and everyone that has lost a loved one. I lost my grandfather in '79 and my little sister a couple of years ago. I've been a survivor for almost 30 years. As others have said, stay positive. This may sound odd but don't let anyone show any sympathy. Its worthless and counterproductive. Be there to support your family. .

As a poster above said, beating cancer is like running a marathon. You don't run 26 miles, you run 1 mile 26 times. I had to go through my cancer alone so every morning when I had to drive myself to   the hospital, I would tell myself that I know I am going to die but today's not the day. You beat cancer 1 day at a time. Stay positive and remember that cancer isn't necessarily a death sentence. Things will be fine for you and your family.

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@lilMac25 sounds like your dad will have a couple of cool scars and a couple-three nights in ICU where the nurses will love him if he's nice to them, because apparently most people act like assholes when they're in an ICU.

My worst memory of that time was coming home and having brightly-colored opioid nightmares. It was like watching a huge TV on the ceiling even while I was awake. Kicked em quick because even if I'm a hillbilly, I still don't have to be a stereotype.

After that will come scans and scans as they do recon. Hopefully including a full-body PET scan. There is an odd peacefulness from finding out what you have, and what you don't have.

I imagine they're gonna start him up on Keytruda or some similar immunotherapy. That stuff is the bomb. Various annoying side effects, but it kills the hell out of cancer cells. If so, he'll go in every few weeks and get doted on by sassy nurses while they hook him up to Super Soldier Juice. He'll probably get some free cheetos as well.

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