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Trivial things that make you surly


elfenix

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I don't know who needs to hear this, but whoever is in charge of sizing mens polo's etc.

WTF are you doing?

As a pretty standard sized male human, I fully expect to be relegated to the kids section soon.  Got a polo from work, it fits great.  It's a fucking M.  I haven't worn a Medium anything since middle school.

Found a Large Adidas golf polo at Marshalls, it might as well have been a 3X.

 

C'mon man.

 

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I don't know who needs to hear this, but whoever is in charge of sizing mens polo's etc.
WTF are you doing?
As a pretty standard sized male human, I fully expect to be relegated to the kids section soon.  Got a polo from work, it fits great.  It's a fucking M.  I haven't worn a Medium anything since middle school.
Found a Large Adidas golf polo at Marshalls, it might as well have been a 3X.
 
C'mon man.
 
Sizing in footwear and clothes in general. Why isn't there any consistency from brand to brand? There is brands of shoes that run smaller or bigger than others.
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9 hours ago, Tylerocks said:

I don't know who needs to hear this, but whoever is in charge of sizing mens polo's etc.

WTF are you doing?

Not only that, but brands fucking with their established sizing and fits! Ralph Lauren managed to push me away by adjusting, adding, and removing random fit options every few years to the point where I now don't know wtf size actually fits me, and gave up on trying. Custom Fit, Custom Slim Fit, Slim Fit, Regular Fit, but a Regular M is not the same size as a Regular M from 5 years ago is not the same as a Regular M from 10 years ago. I can somewhat forgive lack of standardization across different brands, but within a brand???

WTF are you doing?

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5 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Not only that, but brands fucking with their established sizing and fits! Ralph Lauren managed to push me away by adjusting, adding, and removing random fit options every few years to the point where I now don't know wtf size actually fits me, and gave up on trying. Custom Fit, Custom Slim Fit, Slim Fit, Regular Fit, but a Regular M is not the same size as a Regular M from 5 years ago is not the same as a Regular M from 10 years ago. I can somewhat forgive lack of standardization across different brands, but within a brand???

WTF are you doing?

Modern Fit, Athletic Fit, Tailored Fit, New York Fit…

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Where's fat ass fit?  Beer drinkers' fit?  Extra-ball-room fit?  

But honestly, Polo t-shirts seem to get smaller vertically as of late.  I'm not a big and tall guy, but when I wear a polo, I'd expect to raise my arms and my belt or belly button not make an appearance.

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2 hours ago, PvilleStang said:

Where's fat ass fit?  Beer drinkers' fit?  Extra-ball-room fit?  

But honestly, Polo t-shirts seem to get smaller vertically as of late.  I'm not a big and tall guy, but when I wear a polo, I'd expect to raise my arms and my belt or belly button not make an appearance.

 

Dad bod fit?

 

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I get this call at work almost every day:

"I have questions about the paperwork you sent me"

Ok, what's the ID number on the paper?

"Uhh, hang on. I'm driving and it's hard to read this, ha ha".  Or  "I don't have the forms in front of me, I'm currently driving"

Who the fuck decides they have important questions about shit and then immediately jumps into their car and drives around?????

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6 hours ago, Sandman said:

I get this call at work almost every day:

"I have questions about the paperwork you sent me"

Ok, what's the ID number on the paper?

"Uhh, hang on. I'm driving and it's hard to read this, ha ha".  Or  "I don't have the forms in front of me, I'm currently driving"

Who the fuck decides they have important questions about shit and then immediately jumps into their car and drives around?????

Related- dumb motherfuckers cannot navigate our reporting systems and data( see also: set bookmarks/ favorites,) but this behavior is compounded by the utter lack of respect they have by calling me while in the market as if I should walk them through it over the phone( blind.).  Just fuck you, you lazy, inconsiderate motherfuckers.  The old guy(me) shouldn’t be the tech guru.  Put in your own work, assholes. I’m not a fucking helpdesk. 

Edited by slorch
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I ordered some pants from a store online and it was the wrong size so I went to the store to swap it. 

Wasnt sure if the other sizes would fit, so I decided to do a return first, instead of an exchange, and try on the other sizes later while perusing the store.

When I got home I realized the online order was bought during sale at half off, and the replacement I bought back was for full price. 

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12 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

I ordered some pants from a store online and it was the wrong size so I went to the store to swap it. 

Wasnt sure if the other sizes would fit, so I decided to do a return first, instead of an exchange, and try on the other sizes later while perusing the store.

When I got home I realized the online order was bought during sale at half off, and the replacement I bought back was for full price. 

You learned that shit from my wife didn't ya?

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People who text work related shit like an infantile idiot who thinks I share their brain.

"John Smith is coming!"

Ok, is he bringing x, y or z? Is Jane Smith coming who provides similar services and was there the previous week?

I text back.

No answer.

Motherfucker you had your fucking phone in your hand 3 seconds ago, unless you scheduled that text like a fucking lunatic. So answer and give the required details.

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People who text work related shit like an infantile idiot who thinks I share their brain.
"John Smith is coming!"
Ok, is he bringing x, y or z? Is Jane Smith coming who provides similar services and was there the previous week?
I text back.
No answer.
Motherfucker you had your fucking phone in your hand 3 seconds ago, unless you scheduled that text like a fucking lunatic. So answer and give the required details.

You work with my wife? So to speak.
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4 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

My wife does this and it drives me nuts.

"I'm going to run to grab dinner, you want something"?

Me: "Where are you going?"

Silence...

They don't care what you have to say. They just HAVE to get their words out to someone. The text is just a way for her thoughts to reach the universe. 

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6 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said:

My wife does this and it drives me nuts.

"I'm going to run to grab dinner, you want something"?

Me: "Where are you going?"

Silence...

She’s going to drive your nuts. Not sure what you’re complaining about. 

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Not so trivial.
Left the place I was staying in Dakar, Senegal at 11:30 am Texas time Thursday. After a long layover in Brussels and a short one in Newark, I just enjoyed a 5 hour delay because of weather at DFW, during which we got diverted to Houston. I finally arrived at DFW at 10:00 pm Friday.

After getting my truck and driving home to ETX, I should be home around midnight. 36+ hour trip. 
Oh, and as mentioned in the shart thread, the squirts on the planes and in the airports were fun too. 

Edited by nnm
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5 hours ago, nnm said:

Not so trivial.
Left the place I was staying in Dakar, Senegal at 11:30 am Texas time Thursday. After a long layover in Brussels and a short one in Newark, I just enjoyed a 5 hour delay because of weather at DFW, during which we got diverted to Houston. I finally arrived at DFW at 10:00 pm Friday.

After getting my truck and driving home to ETX, I should be home around midnight. 36+ hour trip. 
Oh, and as mentioned in the shart thread, the squirts on the planes and in the airports were fun too. 

Fuuuuuçk

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Bought a takeaway drink at this place and they told us to grab extra straws because their regular straws arent available and all they have see these bamboo/corn/biodegradable bullshit ones that tend to crack and split. 

And they werent wrong. 

Whichever pampered fuckhead propagandist activist that lobbied for this should go to hell and die
 

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1 minute ago, 52-80 said:

Bought a takeaway drink at this place and they told us to grab extra straws because their regular straws arent available and all they have see these bamboo/corn/biodegradable bullshit ones that tend to crack and split. 

And they werent wrong. 

Whichever pampered fuckhead propagandist activist that lobbied for this should go to hell and die
 

Props to the bartender for accurately identifying you as a slow drinker. 

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14 minutes ago, 52-80 said:

I aint chugging tapioca bubble tea bubba

It surprises me that a person who drinks tapioca bubble tea knows how to use the word “bubba.”  Seems to me the go-to appellation used by a bubble tea drinker would be something like “sweetheart” or “dear.”

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13 hours ago, nnm said:

Not so trivial.
Left the place I was staying in Dakar, Senegal at 11:30 am Texas time Thursday. After a long layover in Brussels and a short one in Newark, I just enjoyed a 5 hour delay because of weather at DFW, during which we got diverted to Houston. I finally arrived at DFW at 10:00 pm Friday.

After getting my truck and driving home to ETX, I should be home around midnight. 36+ hour trip. 
Oh, and as mentioned in the shart thread, the squirts on the planes and in the airports were fun too. 

Took me 13 hours to get from LA to Austin yesterday via Love Field. Good times. 

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Just found out, well after the fact, that a high school classmate and another classmate’s younger brother (who I knew) passed away in the past couple of months. And nobody told me.
I mean, I’m not SUPER plugged in to my old high school world, but I keep up with a good number of those guys, and no word at all. And now I find out about both of them at the same time. That’s depressing.

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i live off a fairly quiet street and recently have heard lots of aggressive motor noises like theyre coming from tuner cars.  which is not the culture here at all.

turns out, we've got a bunch of these kinds of fuckers motoring through the street.  theyre not really the culture here either.

loud pipes should be illegal. 

south_park_harley_riders_by_konahrikther

 

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The theme for my son's film class this year was Top Gun, so my wife bought a bunch of cheap, Ray Ban, knockoff aviators for the kids to wear.  There are at least 20 pairs currently sitting on various shelves in my fireplace room/kitchen.  Yesterday, I got pissed while cleaning up after my slob family.  I grabbed a pair of the cheap sunglasses and threw them.  They shattered.  I threw the pair away without thinking about it.  This morning I can't find my Ray Bans.  Yep.  5% chance I grabbed an actual pair of expensive specs to throw across the room.

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4 minutes ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

The theme for my son's film class this year was Top Gun, so my wife bought a bunch of cheap, Ray Ban, knockoff aviators for the kids to wear.  There are at least 20 pairs currently sitting on various shelves in my fireplace room/kitchen.  Yesterday, I got pissed while cleaning up after my slob family.  I grabbed a pair of the cheap sunglasses and threw them.  They shattered.  I threw the pair away without thinking about it.  This morning I can't find my Ray Bans.  Yep.  5% chance I grabbed an actual pair of expensive specs to throw across the room.

The more expensive the sunglasses the more quickly you're going to lose them. This is an absolute law of time and space. 

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1 minute ago, ztejas said:

The more expensive the sunglasses the more quickly you're going to lose them. This is an absolute law of time and space. 

See.  I always believed in the inverse.  Growing up as a poor, I often bought the cheapest ass thing I could find - shoes, sunglasses, cars, etc... As an "adult" I learned that paying more can often save one money due to quality.  I didn't account for childish fits of anger.

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Just now, Knoxtnhorn said:

See.  I always believed in the inverse.  Growing up as a poor, I often bought the cheapest ass thing I could find - shoes, sunglasses, cars, etc... As an "adult" I learned that paying more can often save one money due to quality.  I didn't account for childish fits of anger.

It isn't that at all. It's just that sunglasses specifically place themselves in some unknown space between time and everything itself that's ever existed and as a result the more you love a pair the more likely it is to disappear. 

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when the amazon driver loses your package and you have to wait 3 days before they admit that it's not running late but is in fact lost. i get it, it happens, kinda annoying for next day stuff to then have to wait 3 additional days. issue the refund, restock the package if the driver finds it, let me order a replacement.

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9 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

when the amazon driver loses your package and you have to wait 3 days before they admit that it's not running late but is in fact lost. i get it, it happens, kinda annoying for next day stuff to then have to wait 3 additional days. issue the refund, restock the package if the driver finds it, let me order a replacement.

I've actually had the same box that I sent back (that had missing parts) re-delivered to me. 

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When you order pasta with shrimp and the shrimp have their tails on. Fishing for shrimp with your fingers in spaghetti sauce is gross. No good way to use a knife and fork in a dish of pasta, and there’s no good place to stash the tails. Take the tails off, they belong on fried/grilled/cocktail style shrimp you’re meant to eat with hands. 

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4 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

When you order pasta with shrimp and the shrimp have their tails on. Fishing for shrimp with your fingers in spaghetti sauce is gross. No good way to use a knife and fork in a dish of pasta, and there’s no good place to stash the tails. Take the tails off, they belong on fried/grilled/cocktail style shrimp you’re meant to eat with hands. 

Leave the tails in a pile in the center of the table, directly atop the tablecloth. 

Won't do any good for your dining experience, but it might send the message to the restaurant and the next person might appreciate it. 

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Just finished my week at 6am. Get home and do a few chores I've put off for too long like trimming tree limbs with my new pole saw before it gets too hot. Soon as I knocked that out I change into my weekend fuck off clothes, pour a nice strong drink, fill a fat bowl just like Martha did for George back in the day because she was a righteous lady and right as I'm about to spark up... the phone rings. Seems somebody turned in their 2 weeks notice Thursday then said fuck it and quit outright yesterday.

Now who in the fuck are they going to call to fill 2 last minute 12 hour shifts? You have 3 guesses and the first 2 don't count.

Pretty sure these are Time and a half holiday pay, so that takes some of the sting out of it because the hours alone will push me into regular overtime by 24 hours for the week. They are going to pay for this dearly. Time to start planning that Hawaii trip. Plus the property is closed so no knuckleheads to deal with. Just wish my new drones had shown up in time. This would be the perfect time to test/play with them.

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