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Tell Me About Texas a&m


MrPhlegm

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Weekly Jimbo bingo card - I now figured it out - hearing him talk is just like hearing Rain Man talk, except Rain Man was much more coherent :

At least we weren't ran out of the stadium - welp, can't use this one this week, hopefully it was not your center square

Lots of real game awareness and fantastic analysis (apparently $100 million does not buy what it used to):

"We had a thing"

"I think we were up 24-20 at halftime" (pretty sure it was 0-0 to start the game but need to check notes)

"We gotta fix things better, schematically it's good stuff"

"It was a couple of plays away" (exactly - two touchdowns and a few of them CFL one point rouges (yay CFL) and we win bitches)

"We didn’t know who was gonna play all the way through"  (pretty sure people did play today though, but gotta check notes)

LOTS of sexual innuendo though for the win!

"He got tugged"

"Evan and Moose had some really nice balls"

"Reads took us backside"

Edited by StrippersAndNobelPrizes
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1 hour ago, TXSG8R said:

Another one I forgot. Anytime we had a pre snap penalty all the Aggies around us would yell “that was us” or “we did that” even though it wasn’t loud. 

The friendly Aggies must have directed you to some alternate Kyle Field because Kyle Field is the loudest, most beautiful, most intimidating place to play in the whole wide world. Of all the things the rest of the world fears most about A&M is Kyle Field. Every Aggie knows that.

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The Bilbo Aggins FSU conversion is definitely ahead of schedule.

He never got FSU below .500 just to it so they could have 5 straight losing seasons after.

Imagine the agmelt of 5 straight losing seasons and then shoot that shit straight into your veins just be careful not to OD because its a helluva drug.

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I met an Aggy grad this week here in Manhattan. He was really nice and he lives in Austin. He did his student teaching with a teacher from my high school who had been there for 40 years. Again he was a real nice guy, BUT he thinks Jimbo is doing a great job and doesn’t want him bought out. In general when I’ve met them here they’ve been pretty nice folks. It’s when I’ve been back in Texas that I am around the crazy ones you do your best to just avoid.

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2 hours ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Can't decide what I would enjoy more:

Jimbo stuck at A&M for 8 more years without a single winning season.

Or A&M finding the money to fire him, and get to another school and win a NC

Actually for me it’s both:

Jimbo stuck at A&M for 8 more years without a single winning season, and

A&M NOT finding the money to fire him.

That is misery for all at that dump of an institution and pure joy for me.

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I met an Aggy grad this week here in Manhattan. He was really nice and he lives in Austin. He did his student teaching with a teacher from my high school who had been there for 40 years. Again he was a real nice guy, BUT he thinks Jimbo is doing a great job and doesn’t want him bought out. In general when I’ve met them here they’ve been pretty nice folks. It’s when I’ve been back in Texas that I am around the crazy ones you do your best to just avoid.

Pretty much any aggy outside of Texas is a 2%er. They’re not that invested in aggyness.
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15 minutes ago, DanTheHorn said:

Can't wait for the story on Texags where they helped him find the way to the stadium and to his seat.

.....weeks ago. He was so enamored with aggy hospitality that he refused to leave. Now he takes up residence with the bats, dead dogs, and buried bodies beneath Pyle Field.

Whoop!

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3 hours ago, El Squared said:

Jimbo gets paid a lot to squirm at these post game PC, the pressured speech and constant taking on and off of the glasses adds nice touch to the jet fuel being poured onto this dumpster fire.

Lots of wife sheep/ domestic violence  happening now.

The nervous highlighting and marking up of his pages after each statement is the chef's kiss.

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59 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

That guy is talking to the sleep shoulder guy.

814474A2-D6EC-4E8A-9487-383025D600AC.gif

She's surrounded. She's hating her father and grandfather. She made a big mistake. The indoctrination camp ordeal is wearing off.

What. Have. I. Done?

A last observation. She probably looked beyond the cuddlers behind her thinking, "hey, there's a Surgebutt with a date!" Then she read the "date's" t-shirt.

Then, she looks at the scoreboard and the field.

I. Hate. My. Life.

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4 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

A last observation. She probably looked beyond the cuddlers behind her thinking, "hey, there's a Surgebutt with a date!" Then she read the "date's" t-shirt.

Then, she looks at the scoreboard and the field.

I. Hate. My. Life.

I particularly like the mom behind them. Nothing says BMOC like going to the game with your mom.

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3 hours ago, TXSG8R said:

Weird things I saw at the game yesterday:

guy in an FSU shirt and aggy hat

girl in full Bama gear sitting with a bunch of gators. 

horns down constantly even though they were playing Florida. 

they pump a lot of noise through the speakers throughout the game, their band/crowd doesn’t do a lot outside of the occasional third down.   I could hear the Florida band across the stadium multiple times.

really surprised at the number of Florida fans there

my seat was on a seam in the bleachers and one side of the seam was loose, so every time someone on that side sat down it pinched the shit out of the back of my calf. 


on a positive note, the sausage in their wrap was really good (slovacek garlic pepper jack I think?), but the nachos were damn near inedible.

What disguise did you go in?

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Also was able to see what Jimbo kept scribbling on during the press conference. Apparently he was trying to solve the puzzles galore on his latest Highlights magazine - special Sheep edition!! Totally get it, those things are tough!

Also explains all the sexual innuendo during the press conference.

 

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Edited by StrippersAndNobelPrizes
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